this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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[–] DessertStorms@kbin.social 166 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Pro tip: while DNA doesn't last long in urine, why take the risk, when significantly stinkier animal urines for hunting and/or deterrent purposes exist? RollSafeMeme.jpg

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 68 points 9 months ago (5 children)

I hear you can buy large quantities of super stinky fox urine pretty cheaply online from hunting supplies vendors..

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 48 points 9 months ago (5 children)

wouldnt this add the risk that one's online purchase history could potentially be discovered and used against you as evidence?

[–] tryitout@infosec.pub 91 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Correct. The safest option is extracting it yourself directly from the fox. This also protects against man in the middle attacks.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 21 points 9 months ago

From what I’ve seen in furry porn, foxes are the sexiest animals too.

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 14 points 9 months ago

"it's also hot."

/Paris Hilton twirling hair, snapping bubble gum.

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 11 points 9 months ago

Don't listen to this! It doesn't work.

I found a fox, then extracted urine from the man between me and the fox. He still attacked me.

[–] BottleOfAlkahest@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

It's used to deter pests so just spray some around your property and report the rest stolen.

[–] DessertStorms@kbin.social 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, I'd say if you have anywhere local that would sell it, buy there with cash if you can, otherwise if you're having to buy online try to make your order as least suspicious as you can..

[–] name_NULL111653@pawb.social 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

NOT locally... As soon as cops get a match on what type of urine was used and know there's a hunting vendor in town that sells it, they're absolutely going to ask to see cameras if they're seriously investigating for vandalism charges. Drive far away to get it. Far. Away. Then keep in your house, they can't search your garage without a warrant.

This is not legal advice. Do not attempt this in any way shape or form. The author of this hypothetical, fictional scenario is in no way responsible for actions taken based on this message.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago

Use Tor or something like that?

I'm sure people more knowledgeable than me know how to cover their tracks so that piss-soaked pigs won't catch them that way 🤷

[–] Neato@ttrpg.network 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Why do hunters buy fox urine? Does it attract prey animals?

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 21 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Seems it's not used by hunters but rather to repel pests. Sorta like Ted Cruz, but pests in stead of humans.

[–] Infynis@midwest.social 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Unfortunately, if it attracts predators, it would likely have the same effect on Ted Cruz

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago

It already would anyway, since he's sexually attracted to animal urine in general.

I see no problem with luring an amorous Ted Cruz towards pissed off armed cops, though. That's what we in the trade call a twofer 😉

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[–] Squirrel@thelemmy.club 14 points 9 months ago

My wife got some deer repellent stuff with "putrified egg" in it that I would highly recommend for this purpose.

[–] Coreidan@lemmy.world 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Only a newb would use fresh urine. The trick is storing it in a jug for awhile to let it ferment and get super stinky. Let it sit in the sun for a few days.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 10 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Do it while it is in the tank of the watergun, so you don't get the smell while loading it

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[–] GroundedGator@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Also super soakers are way too conspicuous. Animal urine in a dollar store squirt gun is perfect. Animal urine actually requires less fluid to be effective.

Some cheap perfume would also do in a pinch, or essential oils mixed with cooking oil.

[–] SpunkyMcGoo@lemmy.world 72 points 9 months ago (4 children)

this smells like a honeypot tbh

[–] thesporkeffect@lemmy.world 76 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The police are desperate for fresh urine and will go to any lengths to obtain it

[–] atomicorange@lemmy.world 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)

They could have just asked! I’ll happily piss in any cop car, free of charge.

I'd even give them a Chicago Sunroof

[–] xantoxis@lemmy.world 35 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I think it's actually a post by a satire account intended to convince people to try it. There are some tells, like how many details are included about how you do it and the damage it causes.

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[–] euphoric_cat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I assure you I am the furthest from a fed, I genuinely fucking despise any kind of figure with higher power, and will go out of my way to make it as hard as (reasonably) possible for them to track me or gain evidence for any crime they want to push on me because I was "in the area according to google maps data" or whatever other bullshit they think of these days

[–] orsetto@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 9 months ago

That's what a fed in your position would say.

[–] THEMASTERMIND@feddit.ch 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 54 points 9 months ago (1 children)

any parent knows if you don't want someone to do something you always say the opposite of what you mean

classic rookie parenting mistake

[–] Infynis@midwest.social 16 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Damn, the cops have a piss fetish!

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 24 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Have you never heard of the Streisand effect? Because you will now.

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Have you ever heard of satire accounts? You can't possibly think this is real.

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[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 9 months ago (1 children)

196 meetup in Akron it is, then

[–] euphoric_cat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

my state here in australia is way too corrupt, I need some of that assistance 🤭🫡

196 world tour it is, then!

[–] Pilgrim@beehaw.org 20 points 9 months ago (1 children)

sounds like Robert Evans finally got Super soaker Full of Piss off the ground

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[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

Absolutely never crossed my mind to do something like this. Until I saw this post.

[–] kworpy@lemm.ee 16 points 9 months ago (1 children)

hinders the Police's ability to use that vehicle and protect the community

We're the ones protecting the community from you filthy pigs

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 9 months ago

Stop insulting pigs like that. They are cute and intelligent animals.

[–] Emi621@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)
[–] littletranspunk@lemmus.org 8 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Find and replace:

Find: "do not" replace: ""

Find: "stop" replace: ""

Find: "ing" replace: ""

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[–] Turun@feddit.de 7 points 9 months ago

More like "apolicecruser rule", lol

[–] outer_spec@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 9 months ago

Literally 1984

[–] einlander@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Got to freeze the urine into ice cubes so after you toss it in, it takes time for it to melt and you're no longer on the scene. Just need a cup from a fast food place. No super soaker involved. And you can just spill everything out the cup if things get hot.

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