I was an agent in a former life. Your understanding of the purchasing process is deeply flawed. If you don't fix it, you're going to get screwed over again and again. Fortunately, it's an easy fix. Here's the process you should follow:
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Look up the house you want to purchase.
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Write the offer, sight unseen. Get some kind of offer in front of the seller as early as possible. Sounds scary? It's not: You're going to include "inspection" and "financing" contingencies, and you aren't going to send earnest money until you've actually seen the property.
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Only after the seller accepts or counters your offer do you schedule your first showing. Here is where you confirm the property is what you actually wanted, and is in the "good" condition you assumed. If you don't fall in love the first time you see it in person, exercise your inspection contingency and walk away. If it's not in the "good" condition you assumed when you wrote the offer, plan on renegotiating.
NEVER waste your time "researching" or getting emotionally invested in a property until you have it under contract. If you don't have a contract, it will get sold out from under you.
Your inspection and financing contingencies are your escape route. Use them. Lock the seller in early, and plan on walking away if you don't love everything about the house and the deal.