this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2024
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[–] latenightnoir@lemmy.world 117 points 1 week ago

That moment when you Capitalism your social group.

[–] affiliate@lemmy.world 101 points 1 week ago (3 children)

few people know this but there is actually quite a lot of money to be made from scamming your friends

[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 56 points 1 week ago

There's an entire MLM industry built upon it!

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 29 points 1 week ago

Friends? I prefer the term 'rubes'

“friends”? you mean “potential customers”.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 82 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (4 children)

You do this to me once, shame on you. You do this to me twice, I'm on to you douchebag and I won't bring it up but I'll avoid situations where I pay for you or I'll just tell you it cost £2 more than it does.

I always throw an extra buck onto whatever I owe someone - try this instead. It will make them smile and its a sign of appreciation for covering my cost even if only momentarily. I've found that when I'm paying for multiple people and then trying to collect up, it's not uncommon to get screwed over a bit or not have a fee or a tip or something covered. Be the guy that goes out of the way to show some appreciation. I've probably lost $100 over the past 5 years doing this, but I have enough issues to feel douchy about. I don't need something else.

[–] kboy101222@sh.itjust.works 37 points 1 week ago

All fair points

This guy is a parody account in case you didn't know btw

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 1 week ago

one can phrase it like this for the terminally finance brained: an investment in friends and community is the best investment you can make; humans need other humans to be happy, and a strong community will get through basically anything alive.

[–] isaaclw@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

When somene pays for me, I dont quibble about splitting it even. I use it as a bench mark, but I assume somsone else wont pay.

Also I know theres times I've screwed up and didn't give the fair amount (moatly due to not thinking or being aware of costs), so I try to bump it up and do a bit extra from now on.

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

this is satire.

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 65 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

This guy definitely fucks

...his "friends" over.

[–] Korne127@lemmy.world 62 points 1 week ago (3 children)

They obviously do not have any German friends

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 18 points 1 week ago

Am German, can confirm that I am not friends with this person.

[–] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I absolutely call out inaccuracies like this.

Am I German? 👀

[–] Johanno@feddit.org 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You might be. Germans will sometimes fight over cents for the sake of principle.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 week ago

dunno if germany has this but in sweden we have the tradition that knives cannot be gifted, you must always pay a token amount lest the knife "cut" your relationship.

[–] radicalautonomy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

I don't feel it makes sense to drink the principal sake. Am I Japanese?

[–] SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 week ago

Not anymore

[–] Mohaim@lemmy.blahaj.zone 62 points 1 week ago

I'm getting Ass Pennies energy

[–] hactar42@lemmy.ml 46 points 1 week ago (3 children)

In the US Air Force they use US currency at all overseas facilities and shops on the base. But they don't ship pennies because it's not worth the cost, so they round up or down to the nearest 5. I worked with a guy who was so cheap that when it would round down he would pay with cash and when it would round up he would write a check (this was before debit cards, yes I'm that old).

[–] Robust_Mirror@aussie.zone 21 points 1 week ago

5c is our smallest coin in Australia so all transactions work this way.

If I have to use up some cash at a self serve machine but I don't have enough to cover the whole thing, when I do the debit card portion of my split payment I make sure to leave 2c extra.

So if it's $12 and I have to use up a $5 note I'll split pay $6.98 on my debit, the machine will ask for the other $5.02 and will round down when I put in the $5 note.

No I don't actually care about the 2c but I'm having to type in a split pay number regardless so figure why not.

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 9 points 1 week ago

That's how it works everywhere here. But no one uses cash and all use card/contactless.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 1 week ago

hilariously this is just how things are in all of sweden, we got rid of our equivalent to the penny and now it only remains in a vestigial decimal at the end of prices.

i have no fucking clue why we don't just force all costs to be rounded to the actual smallest unit of currency, all it does is allow people to set dumb prices like 14.95

[–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 41 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

There aren’t many good reasons to ghost someone but you do bring up a good one.

[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

yeah, always round up. owe 17.89? you send $20 and call it interest for covering for you to begin with.

[–] Cassa@lemmy.blahaj.zone 41 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Dave2@lemmy.blahaj.zone 77 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Don't worry, it is a joke account.

[–] iceonfire1@lemmy.world 40 points 1 week ago
[–] NickwithaC@lemmy.world 37 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Is Ken Cheng the new Ken M?

[–] Kacarott@aussie.zone 39 points 1 week ago

He's the Ken M of linked in

[–] Randelung@lemmy.world 31 points 1 week ago

It's sad that satire like this isn't obvious anymore. 100 bucks over 5 years should have been a giveaway, but linkedinlunatics is a thing, so.

God I feel like some people really are like this and wonder why they don't have any friends who are actually decent people.

[–] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 16 points 1 week ago

Save some pence for the rest of us, bezos.

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Sounds like a cover story for someone with dyslexia tbh

[–] RandomVideos@programming.dev 9 points 1 week ago

Dyslexia doesnt exist

It was just a cover so people can steal fractions of dollars from other people "by accident"

[–] ShareMySims@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Ah yes, crabs in a bucket, doing yet another of the capitalist's jobs for them.. 🙄

[–] Nfamwap@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

I think he's joking

[–] Barzaria@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 week ago

This reminds me of LinkedIn lunatics. Funny

[–] GaMEChld@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Conversely, this also means you value your honor that little.

[–] Fortatech@gregtech.eu 2 points 1 week ago

So the grindset begins...

[–] LostNetizen@lemm.ee 1 points 1 week ago

I don't use LinkedIn. But most of the screenshots I see of posts on linkedin on other platforms are stuff like this.