this post was submitted on 06 Jul 2024
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NonCredibleDefense

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[–] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 69 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

When they kick down your door, how you gonna come?

With you hands on your head, or on 175 lbs of tannerine and wood screws?

[–] mozz@mbin.grits.dev 31 points 4 months ago (1 children)

* kick at your front door
how you gonna come
wi' your hands on your head

FTFY

For the unfamiliar

[–] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

We appreciate the correction

[–] mozz@mbin.grits.dev 12 points 4 months ago

🎶🎶🎶

🔫

🎶

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 30 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Does a booby-trap that only responds to lethal force technically pass the Katko test?

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 19 points 4 months ago (1 children)

What is the katko test.... I'm afraid to look it up? 14 watch lists is plenty

[–] prayer@sh.itjust.works 30 points 4 months ago (2 children)

A famous legal case defining what is and isn't allowed for defense of property, specifically about lethal booby traps to stop trespassing. It basically says that you can't use lethal force to defend property using booby traps as they are indiscriminate and therefore cannot determine if certain criteria (i.e. reasonable fear for your life) are met.

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 31 points 4 months ago (2 children)

... because Katko used a mousetrap and a shotgun shell to blow a dude's leg off. Over some antique jars.

It's one of those cases where the jury immediately knows a line has been crossed and just needs to hash out how far back.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Well, some folks are pretty passionate about collecting jars. Thanks for a credible reply.

[–] xx3rawr@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 months ago

He just got sick of those vase-slaying MCs

[–] ReplicantBatty@lemmy.one 5 points 4 months ago

I mean, Link kinda had it coming at that point

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 months ago

Thanks for the context, I thought the "Katko test" might be a funni/memey reference. TIL! Happy Cake Day!

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 18 points 4 months ago (2 children)

On reflection, the real question is whether you're home at the time, since that makes it the castle doctrine instead of "defense of property." At which point you're free to go full Home Alone a la Last Crusade. The penitent doorkicker kneels! bzzZZZzzzt

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Yesh. When do I get to shlap my shon for blashphemy? Sho exshited aboit my shcenes.

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 months ago

What'd the five fingers say to the face? SHLAP!

What'd Boris's face say to those five fingers? Achoo.

[–] Rafael@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 months ago

At which point you're free to go full Home Alone a la Last Crusade.

Stop stop I can only get so erect

i think the technicality here is that it would be akin to negligent manslaughter at best. Since self defense wouldn't really apply.

[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 25 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Boris is going to get you killed.

[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

You and all the pigs who come for you.

[–] KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

aside from the fact that this would probably completely total your home, and kill your neighbors dog through an act of god.

This is a great idea.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 months ago

User name checks out, there is a significant chance Boris will kill time itself.

[–] YourPrivatHater@ani.social 17 points 4 months ago

Boris the undefeated!

[–] remotedev@lemmy.ca 12 points 4 months ago (4 children)

Wouldn't this put those thin blue line boys they love in danger?

[–] deegeese@sopuli.xyz 51 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They only love the thin blue line when it’s kneeling on a black guy’s neck.

Plenty of Christian domestic terrorists want to kill cops who want to take their guns away. Weaver, Koresh, McVeigh, Bundy, etc.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 21 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I want it on record, stenographers please take this down...I am anti-Ted Bundy. I don't care what charming, yet down to earth actor played him in the biopic. Glorifying a serial killer through entertainment is wrong. I haven't seen it, I do not intend to do so, now or ever, thank you, good night.

[–] darvocet@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It sounds like you may support Ted Bundy….

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 14 points 4 months ago

I deny it, categorically. The allegations that I played golf with a pro-Bundy lobbyist are absolutely false and slanderous. I had no idea anyone else was on the course on the time, as I was focused on the nation's business and correcting my slice.

[–] rocketpoweredredneck@sh.itjust.works 25 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The people who make these memes aren't the same people who like the cops. There are some very confused people who think 'no step on snek' and prostrating themselves before the ones who'd be doing the stepping makes some kind of sense, but they're also the same people who think climate change isn't real and vaccines kill people. Their opinion is irrelevant.

Fuck the police

[–] upto60percentoff@kbin.run 4 points 4 months ago

Snakes wriggle around desperately on their bellies all the time it fits perfectly

[–] Vendetta9076@sh.itjust.works 22 points 4 months ago (2 children)

You're confusing two groups of people with very little overlap

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

No they love the cops when the cops are policing them and keeping them in line. The thin blue line between US and THEM.

When its their property and their rights, the governent must be stopped from tyrany.

[–] Vendetta9076@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago

Once again, you're confusing two groups of people with very little overlap.

The person who would make Boris is a libertarian not a conservative. Americans have a wildly warped view on politics.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Everyone here is being tendentious and obfuscatious! :::Confused screaming:::

[–] Vendetta9076@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago

Whatcha mean?

[–] Mango@lemmy.world 6 points 4 months ago

Who is they?

[–] psmgx@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Still won't stop them from shooting your dog

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Rowdy is also filled with Tannerite and wood screws.

[–] yuri@pawb.social 3 points 4 months ago

Rowdy is actually tannerite, a mason jar of gasoline, and the full contents of one (1) stolen sharps disposal bin.