I want my best friend alive again, and the cancer to be gone. He can have the third.
this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2023
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I'd give all three of mine to this guy.
Sorry for your loss ;(
- Reduce atmospheric CO2 to pre-industrial levels
- Give me the ability to see/hear remote locations at will.
- Give me Jessica Jones style mind-control, but without needing to be physically present.
'scuse me while I go unfuck some shit.
Reduce atmospheric CO2 to pre-industrial levels
"SEE! We told you the problem would fix itself! Now we don't need to take any action to better ourselves for the sake of the environment!"
Luckily you thought of that and using your third wish, you can fix it properly.
Infinite wishes
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Motivation to complete anything I decide to do.
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General happiness with life.
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Good health for my immediate family and I for 50 years.
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A post scarcity society
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World peace
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The eradication of authoritarianism
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Fix global environment/emissions to stable levels.
Fix ignorance/hate
Fix capitalism & greed
a private reality which obeys whatever rules i want it to.
the ability to interface this reality with any others, as well as disconnect it, at will.
1 - safety plan from other poster "if i, as i am now or as i become subsequent to their fulfilment, am unsatisfied with the outcome of any of my wishes, i wish to return to the moment i first was granted them, retaining full knowledge of the timeline as i caused it to be but with the ability to make diffent choices"
2 - maine plan - everyone wakes up to find out we are in a simulation and the real world is a post scarcity start trek like society but with total peace and harmony and none of the fighting
3 - backup plan - my own personal universe/dimension where I control all aspects of it and can enter it and leave it whenever I want. It exists outside of our time/space so when I enter and leave I can go anywhere within either as a destination
Omnipotence. Then I'm pretty much done.
After that, add Omniscience
Congratulations! You now have the same relationship to the universe that a programmer has to his code.
Good luck, and happy debugging
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Yes! Give me all of the science!
Not even necessary, with omnipotence you can do that youself. But a little mystery in life would still be fun, no?
Screw it! Just change the laws of reality so you can be omniscient and have mystery at the same time. Make it so those two things don’t conflict.
what's the monkey paw mechanic I'm confused
In a short story, the monkey's paw is an artifact that grants three wishes of the person who holds it, albeit in the worst way possible.
The story goes that a pensioner and his wife receive the paw from some guy who warns them that the paw twists the wishes, but they pay the warning no mind and wish for a sum of money. A finger on the paw curls, and a factory foreman shows up with the money explaining that their son has died of a horrific mutilating accident in the factory. The insurance policy pays the money out to the surviving members of the family.
The wife wishes that their son were alive again, another finger curls, and a few hours later they hear another knock at the door. The wife rushes to welcome their son, however, recalling the stranger's warning and imagining how terrifying the mutilated body of their son might look, the father uses the last finger to wish the son dead and buried again. Incidentally, there doesn't appear to be a negative on that wish apart from the horror that's already been visited on them.
I wish you hadn’t asked that
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Infinite positive-effects-only wishes (what I consider to be positive)
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Everyone now has empathy and selflessness, eliminating corruption, greed, stepping over each other, exploitation, etc.
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Post-scarcity society, eliminating class even more than the above, since everyone can own whatever they want. Basically a real life Replicator.
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Since I got infinite wishes, given number 3, society will have an even bigger trash problem than we already have. So a convenient, self-contained black hole we can put trash into, inventing a method of creating dark matter, revolutioning how we store energy, Futurama-style, which then becomes free due to post-scarcity.
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Healthy planet, healthy people, healthy animals, plants, etc. Also includes mental health (infinite wishes are nice)
Two chicks at the same time
Not sure about the third wish
That’s … that’s what you’d do with three wishes? Two chicks at the same time? Couldn’t you do that without three wishes?
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To own my own theme park in which the rides never break down so that everyone can enjoy it anytime.
£10 million. I think that’s more than enough to live off.
The ability to forget something at will so that I can experience something again for the first time.
Eric Cartman is on lemmy?
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Universal healthcare
Capitalism and authoritarianism eradicated
Everyone's medical and student debt wiped
- A bottle that refills magically with the most delicious, cool, refreshing water
- Wolverine's ability to regenerate any body part
- And invisibility cloak
I wish for a machine that can convert matter to its subatomic particles and then rearrange them back together according to any pattern that it has stored by previously disassembling, that is also able to be integrated into the human body.
I wish for an autonomous cloud computer system that can store both the patterns and a full copy of every bit of data currently on the internet and that the machine produced and that has a neural integration system so that the entire process can be controlled by the mind, and that this system also be able to be integrated into the human body.
I wish to have both of those and myself, 1 year from today to be brought, fully functional and with all knowledge and systems intact into the past, taking the place of my 18 year old self.
A monkeys paw mechanic for everyone in this thread except for me, the annullment of my own bodily needs (eg. sleep, food, water), and i dunno, maybe a cool rock
Haw haw reverse uno I use my monkey paw wish to wish the same upon to you also cool rock
- For learning to be easier for everyone, so humanity can grow wiser.
- For kind acts to extend people's lives, so humanity will grow kinder.
- For the afterlife to be as perfect as promised, so we can see them again after a life of kind wisdom.
•1. I wish you would cry harder and not stop
•2. I wish no one can ever talk to you ever again
•3.
I wish your pain was gone
Wipe the student loan debt and I'll donate the other two wishes to charity.
Seriously, fuck this six figures of bullshit.
- The ability to teleport anything anywhere (a few mfs would get to Mars wayy earlier than they thought)
- Wipe all debt and records of debt world wide
- Flips locs to the side and smiles world peace
Video game style save states so when I mess things up I can just go back and fix them as long as I remembered to save. Like that one rick and morty episode except without killing a version of myself every time I use it
My own General Systems Vehicle complete with a holodeck lol.
Immortality via transfer of consciousness into permanent artificial bodies for me, my wife, and our dog.
All humans will become much more proactive and thus don't put up with corporate or government bullshit.
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To be able to convince anyone of anything, without reservations, whenever I choose
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That I can never be forcefully contained within any construct or vessel, allowing me to leave whenever I like and return as I please.
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Become a genie
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Iunno, whatever I feel like convincing the first person to rub my completely voluntary lamp to wish for.
Mastery over life and death
The ability to change all aspects of myself at will
Ownership of a well-organized collection of infinite-lifespan SSDs (100TB each) collectively containing English translations of all encyclopedias that have or will ever exist, human or otherwise, including full version history. And the proper facility for storing such.
Everyone becomes a god of their own universe. Now you all can do whatever the hell you want.
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Immortality.
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The ability to link one’s life to mine, effectively make others immortal.
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Plant the Overview Effect into the mind of every human and make it a part of humanity’s consciousness forever.
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