this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2024
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If you need a bottle opener to open a bottle you aren't alcoholic
REAL MAN OPEN THEIR BOTTLE WITH THEIR TEETH
I usually just stick it in my ass and use my expertly trained clenched sphincter to open the bottle, like a real man.
So uh... the pair of channel locks I keep on my coffee table... Am I poor or an alcoholic?
For starters, you don't own a very fancy coffee table.
Sorry I should have clarified. I refer to the trunk thats in front of my couch that has shit on and in it as a coffee table
And your couch?
A wild Vance appears
Oh well in that case, at least the couch is fancy. Jorkin Dapeenits has discerning tastes.
Doesn't matter if you're sober, or even a man. It's wise to have a coffee table suitable for storing your channel locks. If you have a spouse it's more wise to listen them.