this post was submitted on 30 Sep 2024
1099 points (99.0% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26790 readers
3008 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works 99 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 80 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I was just coming to say that! I get the "best" of both worlds, Excel sheets to track production while I sit in this shitty factory and breathe God only knows what!

Bonus: I can't even afford a home after it all! Yay America!

[–] eezeebee@lemmy.ca 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Bonus: I can't even afford a home after it all! Yay America!

Same goes for Canada! Yay, twinsies!

[–] iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago

At least we can get health care without bankrupting us while we are saving for that home.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

So you are housefree? Land of the free, indeed

[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 25 points 1 month ago

I have the luxury of renting someone else's garage, living in the upper portion of it and paying their entire mortgage for them...

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 8 points 1 month ago

Hexavalent Chromium VI!

[–] Boxscape@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Can be both!

Yep.
At some of the Excel jobs, the toxic fumes come from your manager's mouth.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yeah, I live in a area of the country where (only since 2020) we can expect long stretches of days where the sky is orange and the AQI is 300+. Climate change has made sure the toxic fumes are for everyone!

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 78 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Don't get me.wrong I really love excel and enjoy spending my days playing with it; but sometimes I'll look at my work in a big picture context and don't understand how I make so much money doing a totally made up thing that serves no practical purpose.

[–] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 50 points 1 month ago

If you tried working at your company for a week with no paperwork or spreadsheets you'd realize their necessity pretty quick. You are a bureaucromancer. Very little gets done, and none of it on budget, without you playing with spreadsheets all day.

Soldiers might fight a war, but logistics wins one. It's no different for business.

[–] DillyDaily@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

I felt the same thing watching my partner working this morning. I've been with him 10 years and I still can't explain his job beyond its title because as far as I understand he oversees people as well as works on software that's developed, deployed and managed by another company, but they don't manage software or services or develop anything but they deploy it, but that's not not his team, and it's this one specific program, but it's actually 12 integrated programs, and he's working on one that's in development but he's not a developer, but is not part of anything they're actually doing yet, and that's not his main role.

Everytime he explains it, I get more lost...

What is this job? It's obviously stressful, a lot of other companies rely on on whatever this service is, and my partner, as of this year, makes 8x my income, so it must be important.... Right!?

Right!? He's not making 8x my income pushing pencils....right!?

I teach General Education at a community centre for people who missed out on formal schooling.

My job is 3 words "I teach SOSE", and you know almost exactly what I do you can picture the main tasks and also picture my output (educated graduates)

His job did not exist 15 years ago, the concept of a job like his in software for the masses did not exist 50 years ago, a desk job to this degree of pencil pushing did not exist 100 years ago.

Sometimes I think about how my job is technically one of the oldest in the world, but never a well paid one.

Sometimes I consider a pencil pushing job for a few years, to just get my retirement fund sorted, but if I don't even understand what the job is how can I expect myself to do it?

[–] shani66@ani.social 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Humans have a complexity fetish I'll never understand. Nothing is ever as complex as it seems (in the way it seems, anyway).

[–] tacosplease@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

I feel like it's just the opposite.

Try designing something without instructions or a template. You'll run into a thousand little issues you didn't realize needed to be considered.

That's true of software, sure. But it's also true if you want to make a wooden dresser without plans or build an rc airplane from scratch.

In my experience, things are rarely as simple as they first seem.

[–] Nomecks@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 month ago

You're so right. You should be mindlessly using an ERP!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] dsilverz@thelemmy.club 35 points 1 month ago (3 children)

There's a third one, too, it's a funny one: you stare at countless (mostly fake) job vacancies expecting to be hired so to "deserve to survive", while bills can't stop arriving. You resign from your 10-yr IT career and try to apply for a simpler, factory vacancy, just to hear from HRs that your CV is "too good to be applied for our simpler jobs". In the meantime, you catch yourself selling your soul and autonomy (constantly forced to accept the circumstances) to these people that share the same blood lineage as yours (some call them "familiars") because you can't see another option, except for going homeless, where you'll be constantly assaulted by cops and people saying "go get a job" to you because you got nothing. By the way, you also inhale toxic fumes from air pollution from cities. And you stare at a Word document, your own CV, thinking "what did I do wrong?".

[–] Num10ck@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

apply to lower jobs without most of your resume.

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 month ago (6 children)

"could you tell us about this 10 year gap in your resume?"

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

"Not really. I signed an NDA"

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 month ago

yes i was fucking your mother

[–] abbadon420@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago

I was a stay-at-home dad while my wife was a high payed lawyer, or I had to care for my elderly mother while she was dying from ass cancer, or I was doing drugs but I've been clean for over a year now, or shut up that's none of your business why are you even asking this shit for a job that requires no education or experience!?...

[–] superkret@feddit.org 3 points 1 month ago

"To be honest, I don't remember most of it, due to all the drugs."

"You're hired, welcome at Ford."

[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

“could you tell us about this 10 year gap in your resume?”

People lie to get higher paying jobs, lie to get a lower one:

5 year a Accenture doing Full Stack Development = 5 years at Accenture doing data entry

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Damage@slrpnk.net 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Is your experience IT exclusively, or do you also have (even rudimentary) programming experience? Industrial automation is a great option. I feel blessed, having started from below the bottom (not all people are fit to be parents!) working as a metal carpenter while still underage, to have managed to get into this field, through hard work and, most importantly, a good amount of luck.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Rolive@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 1 month ago

Haha I work in a laboratory so I do both regularly.

[–] klemptor@startrek.website 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fucking excel. Lemmy lemme tell you. At a former position my boss wanted me to make an economic model in excel. I begged to do it in R but no dice. Annoyingly VBA was the skill all other employers were interested in (in my brief foray into industry). I had a million sads.

[–] Sinuousity@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

VBA is horrid and incredibly outdated. I've written c# code that ran identical calculations on data being run through excel at literally over a million times the speed.

[–] sleeped@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 month ago

They just added native support for Python in excel

[–] JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

I hate excel so much I almost wanna consider the toxic fumes.

For years I assumed it was as simple as making large tables, and that was it. It was truly humbling when I had to use it for the first time and learned how much shit you can do with that software.

And I still have no idea how to use it.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] nayminlwin@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 month ago

Even programming jobs are like excel sheets with extra steps.

[–] Thann@lemmy.ml 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Either way your back is fucked

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

If you get a standing desk, your knees can be fucked as well.

[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I am a secret third thing.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I used to do the inhale thing while I was a student. Gave me the motivation to pull through and be able to do the Excel thing now.

[–] abbadon420@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago

That makes you a well rounded person. Getting the full human experience. It's not always fun, but it makes life more complete.

[–] random_character_a@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

I'm doing both at the same time.

Production level fumes leak in to the office. Employer informed that it's just a harmless smell.

[–] v4ld1z@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 month ago

Currently doing an SLT apprenticeship. Most toxic fumes I'll be inhaling in the future will be the stench of poop in nursing homes lol

[–] yumpsuit@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

inheriting a genetic disease because my lungfish grandsire wouldn’t put on a fucking respirator around airborne hazards

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I'd rather inhale toxic sheets at work or stare at excel fumes all day

[–] PhreakyByNature@feddit.uk 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My body releases some toxic sheets sometimes.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

Jokes on you, I’m an engineer, I do both

[–] lolola@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 month ago

And in the precise moment I saw this, I realized both of my monitors were displaying Excel on full screen. Sigh.

[–] childeofentropy@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 month ago

I have the privilege of doing both 😎😵‍💫

[–] Samsy@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 month ago

This meme is verstörend.

[–] Fester@lemm.ee 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Office Space 2 plot revealed

[–] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

Just leave my stapler alone this time.

[–] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago

Dang... Went from being around running cars all day to spending my days looking at excels sheets...

load more comments
view more: next ›