this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] Nougat@fedia.io 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

“We assume monkeys were unaware of the identity, party affiliation, or policies of any of the candidates,” they wrote.

I fucking love this.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 5 points 1 month ago

Some bold assumptions, if you ask me!

I give the best bananas, people say, nobody in the whole world gives better bananas than me 🍌, and when I give a banana, some assume, I don't just give a banana, but see they're coming, their (sic) rapists, and they're not sending their best people, but when i flush the toilet it doesn't work quite right and that's why folks, that's why when I give this monkey the best banana in the world, that's why people don't think it be like that but it do.

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago

Well they're gonna be voting in it, so why not?

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 18 points 1 month ago

Literally anything can prefict the election if you count random chance as prediction, yes.

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

Why not, they can almost write Dickens

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Only 2 photos? "WhErE ArE ThE 3rD PaRtIeS?!!?"

[–] DandomRude@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

At this point I'm convinced that they are the only ones who can.

[–] Windex007@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

AMAZING read. Like, in a Tommy Wiseau kinda way.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 2 points 1 month ago

“That a … 65-year-old votes like a 5-year-old suggests that there is something in our genes that probably drives decisions,”

Well it suggests something alright. :-|

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 points 1 month ago

We've had two as presidents.

If W And Trump can win an election, they might be able to predict one as well.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I predict that it will either be Trump or Kamala... or someone else. So there, one just did.:-) 🙉

[–] DrownedRats@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 1 points 1 month ago

I would have thought so too, but recently I think it's not going to be as bad as once we feared.