A housecat can kill a level 1 commoner, you know.
this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2024
495 points (98.2% liked)
Funny
6121 readers
1445 users here now
General rules:
- Be kind.
- All posts must make an attempt to be funny.
- Obey the general sh.itjust.works instance rules.
- No politics or political figures. There are plenty of other politics communities to choose from.
- Don't post anything grotesque or potentially illegal. Examples include pornography, gore, animal cruelty, inappropriate jokes involving kids, etc.
Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
But it can't jump (I don't remember if that ever got errata'd or is being changed in OneD&D)
On a crit it can kill a level 1 wizard
You could take any one of those completely out of context and they'd still be solid.
I’ve already been living my life on these tenets.
Knew a guy who asserted he could easily fight several cats at once and win. I truly hope he finds out one day.
Any healthy adult human could though. An old friend of mine accidently killed a cat with a single kick while "defending" his cat that was being attacked (I wasn't there so don't ask how). He was ~14 years old at the time. At the end of the day, humans are large animals, most of just don't want to hurt other creatures so we restrain ourselves.
Completely agree. The textbook is talking about fighting a cat to help it, not destroy it. You would get bit for sure but could easily win.
Now how big could the cat get before it is a fair 1v1
Somewhere smaller than a tiger, that would win 100% of the time. I'd guess 30 lbs is where things start to get serious
Humans have fought off hungry cougars. Sadly, not all humans have.
But are we talking a fight before one side backs down? Or a fight to the death?
I don't think cats back down unless they can run away
Actual fights between humans and cougars. The cougars get killed by other humans if they "win". The cougar runs away if the human wins.
A woman near my hometown strangled a rabid bobcat that came after her daughter with her bare hands. Multiple broken fingers, major lacerations, but she got him. Barely. Bobcats are 2 to 3 times the size of a housecat, for those who don't know.
Sadly, not all humans have. You still talking about cats?
Yeah we're really World Of Cardboarding it up at all times. You know the stereotypes about crackheads being dangerous in a fight? That capacity is inside us at all times.
I said several, but as the memory returns I'm recalling he might have claimed as much as twenty at once.
That's such a fantastically stupid opinion to have that a dose of reality might do him some good
It was far from his worst. I had to ditch that guy.
Edit: very far, to be clear
It was far from his worst.
This does not surprise me in the least
Instructions Unclear: Took steroids, turned off brain; locked in never ending combat with cat.
No the instructions were pretty clear, this is on you. Did you maybe turn off your brain before reading the instructions?
In any case, please send cat pictures.
I am just a cat climbing toy 😭
KITTY
I have been prescribed steroids since I was a kid. That is the benefit of having asthma.
Don't fight a cat everyday
Fight a cat, steal its drugs, repeat when you run out, got it!
Preferably don't fight a cat any day
The fuck is a "fair fight"?
No tactical nuclear weapons, cluster bombs, sharp sticks etc. for the monkey with opposable thumbs
Welp my Scorched Earth char is out I guess
Well, that's just loser talk. ALWAYS nuke from orbit.
I like thegirlwiththedogs ' wisdom,"As always, we disarm our opponent before battle."