I cannot believe how every day more insane shit comes out about him. Lying about his finances, homophobia/transphobia, it just keeps going
this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2023
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idk why Republicans are so upset at him, he seems to be their natural leader.
If I had to invent a strawman to epitomize everything wrong with Republicans, it would not be as abhorrent as Mike Johnson because he's fucked up in ways I haven't even thought about.
I have to admit “Republican without a bank account” and “shares lack of porn activity with son” were not on my GOP bingo card.
"lack of"
ikr? I keep wondering when we’ll find out they both have secret porn devices.
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... he’s fucked up in ways I haven’t even thought about.
because... you're fairly normal. normal people don't think like he does. Even modestly fucked up people don't think like he does.
Maybe I missed something or maybe it’s just that I was raised evangelical but I haven’t been shocked by anything that’s come out about him. He’s pretty garden variety as far as beliefs they espouse, not that that makes them or him less horrible I’m just surprised others are surprised
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Or maybe more people are thinking for themselves and not buying in to the BS.
That's the rub, ain't it. I understand that these religious world views are their reality, but more and more people are snapping out of it and coming into a more secular state, a common reality. But it is truly worrisome that there are these powerful wingnuts out there that are trying to claw us back into their reality, as if to say "you don't know any better, I am a light of God and I will show you the path, whether you like it or not." Motherfucke,r I don't give a rat's ass about your "christian" views and how I am somehow divinely mandated to oblige it because you say so. I guarantee that my morality is more Christian than yours, and that most of us just want to go about our lives in peace and not waging holy war against those who aren't in lockstep with our views.
Except in many countries, these guys seized power and kept it. Iran, Afghanistan... This is what's happening in the US right now. If there's no pushback hard, soon, I really don't think you will still be a democracy in 10 years.
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I wish the rapture was real so the rest of us could just get on with our lives without these manipulative greedy fucks
It probably was real, but only like 6 folks made the cut, so nobody noticed, and we're all just living through the tribulations like it's nothing
The only thing that would be the icing on the cake would all of these "Christians" would still be firmly on planet earth while everyone of the LGBTQ Alphabet would ascend. I know I am being hyperbolic but people can understand what I am getting at.
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Hey, Mike. Prove your god exists.
I have no reason to fear something that isn't demonstrably real. And neither do you.
Sincerely, an ex-fundigelical.
You don’t even have to make that challenge. The god you and I used to believe in can’t even pass its own ethical scrutiny, even if there were a deity like that it would be a cruel and evil one
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But you just need to hAvE FaItH…
To think if this man hadn't accepted a nomination for the speaker of the house we would have never known how wack-a-doodle the man is. So crazy he doesn't even have a savings, checking or retirement account because he is so crazy and modest.
Not just that, but who else is avoiding scrutiny by not being speaker? People missed everything about Santos until after the election, basically.
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beginning to believe his christo-fascist bullshit and Tuberville's logjam on top military brass are both preambles to the 2025 project the fucking Heritage Foundation is promoting.
Imagine for just one fucking second that an liberal group produced that fucking seditious, anti-american trash plan? There need to be hearings about this shit: your plan is to gut the government, deploy the military and set up camps day 1? WHAT THE FUCK?
THERE NEED TO BE HEARINGS ABOUT THIS SHIT.
That is exactly Tuberville's plan
Y'all armed up, right?
In a country where there are 410m+ guns and 330m people I can't endorse the 'go get a gun' theory of democratic government. Yes, people should defend themselves, but damn, adding shit-tons more guns doesn't seem like a solution. Massive respect for John Brown gun clubs and the like, but (prior service army) I recoil at the fetishization of firearms as a 'culture' of anything but more gun violence killing kids and other innocents.
edit: sorry about your cows.
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Talking to pastor Jim Garlow on a broadcast of the World Prayer Network, Johnson spoke ominously of America facing a “civilizational moment.” He said, “The only question is: Is God going to allow our nation to enter a time of judgment for our collective sins? … Or is he going to give us one more chance to restore the foundations and return to Him?”
The segment was filmed Oct. 3, just weeks before Johnson’s unexpected rise to become speaker of the House. Garlow pressed the clean-cut Louisiana congressman to say “more about this ‘time of judgment’ for America.” Johnson replied: “The culture is so dark and depraved that it almost seems irredeemable.” He cited, as supposed evidence, the decline of national church attendance and the rise of LGBTQ youth — the fact, Johnson lamented, that “one-in-four high school students identifies as something other than straight.”
Discussing the risk of divine retribution, Johnson invoked Sodom, the Old Testament city destroyed by God for its wickedness with a rain of burning sulfur. Johnson is a polished orator, but in a closing prayer with Garlow he grew tearful. Johnson intoned, “We repent for our sins individually and collectively. And we ask that You not give us the judgment that we clearly deserve.”
Oh no, gay people aren't being persecuted and people don't believe in my brand of absurdity. My imaginary friend hates that!
Funny enough, he doesn't exactly get why Sodom was destroyed. They wanted to take a guest in their town and rape them. Lot offered his daughters instead of the guest, who was an angel, and they refused. (And for some reason, God said Lot was alright despite that.)
What brought down the divine retribution itself wasn't being gay, but hostility and violence to guests. It wasn't even sexual assault, since God found Lot to be upstanding and he was going to offer his daughters.
I feel like this interpretation jives pretty well with what Jesus actually said, and ironically enough for Johnson, that places him and his party squarely under God's wrath. I mean it's no surprise, but the dramatic irony is hilarious.
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Johnson doth protest too much.
One doesn't do this unless they have an unhealthy relationship with sexuality and porn:
he and his teenage son monitor each other’s every keystroke in an effort to make sure they don’t expose themselves to pornography.
This was recently revealed in a clip that was posted by the user Receipt Maven on X. Last year, Johnson spoke on a panel during a “War on Technology” conference sponsored by a Baptist church in Benton, La. In it, Johnson enthusiastically endorsed a surveillance app called Covenant Eyes. The app, which is promoted by churches and other conservative religious groups such as Promise Keepers, has users designate “accountability partners” to hold them to task in the event they stray into illicit digital outer space. Often the accountability partner is a pastor or fellow church member.
Covenant Eyes, which costs about $15 a month, takes one screenshot per minute, Wired reported last year in a story about what it called “anti-porn shameware,” which is a multimillion-dollar industry.
Johnson’s accountability partner, he said, was his teenage son Jack. Once a week, he said, he and Jack receive a report of what the other has been doing on his phone, laptop or tablet.
“If anything objectionable comes up, your accountability partner gets an immediate notice,” Johnson said. “It looks for keywords, search terms and also images. It’s really sensitive.” Johnson said he once got an alarm about Jack’s questionable internet usage involving a blurry image of two women. “I had to zoom in on it and unblur it,” Johnson said, “and it’s two middle-aged teachers.”
I suspect the only way he can stop looking at that sweet sweet man-flesh on the internet is knowing his son is looking at his screen over his shoulder at all times.
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"And I'm the one to deliver it!"
Why is it that everyone who thinks their god wants to punish someone takes it upon themselves to do the punishing? Is god so fucking weak that he wants to punish us, but can't do it himself? If god wants to punish us, let him do it and Mike Johnson can stay the fuck out of it.
The grand irony is how literal a violation of the third commandment this is. This shit right here is what taking the Lord's name in vain really means.
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Who gives a shit if 1 in 4 high schools identifies as something other than straight?
How about focus on the actual commandments Jesus taught, which by the way, were: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind" and "Love your neighbor as yourself". FFS.
In their mind they do. "Love the sinner, not the sin" is what they always say. They think them caring about the person being less gay is them "loving them"
Progress is God punishing conservatives for being evil.
Hey Mike Johnson, stop grunting for the sun to come up every morning and just touch the monolith. It did wonders for the rest of us apes.
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How does anyone look at that picture, and think those people are perfectly normal?
How does anyone listen to Mike Johnson without concluding that man is crazy?
I'll tell you how, the only way is that they themselves are crazy too!
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Why does he care so much what kids identify as? its a little C R E E P Y
He certainly has been depraved, of fulfilling his dark fantasies since epstein got clocked out and the new ranch owners snuffed him, i bet.
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The Republican party is the greatest threat to national security we have
Every accusation is a confession, as per standard procedure.
God reveals himself to be real.
Smites the religious nutjobs that promote hate.
Does not elaborate.
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Church used to feast with their people like 120 days out of the year.
Now pastors buy jet planes and mock those that didn't help them do it.
Make churches a place people want to share their lives and they will. otherwise we get enough teaching from how the profits look from here.
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These people are just so weird. And this guy is the perfect representation of these conservative freaks.
And the depraved in the US are - tada! - Republican voters. God, feel free to purge.
I dunno, there's something so infuriating about having this guy purport to speak on behalf of all Americans when pretty obvs he hates most of us
Separation of Church and State is just a myth right now. This is the problem right here, radicalized beliefs are dictating the governing in the country.
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Love it or leave it, Mikey
Bunch of fucktards.
I've committed adultery; I've slept with married people, and I had sex outside of my marriage. I've had sex with men and women, all outside of marriage. I've been to sex clubs and orgies. More than one three-way and one more-than-three-way. I've made and participated in porn. I've been to strip clubs. Based on my experience, I'd say depravity is on the whole pretty damn fun, and I recommend depravity to my fellow Americans, although if you want to be monogamous that's fine too.
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