this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2023
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Star Trek

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[–] skullgiver@popplesburger.hilciferous.nl 56 points 1 year ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

[This comment has been deleted by an automated system]

[–] hglman@lemmy.ml 30 points 1 year ago

If I didn't have reason to reject discovery before, now i really do.

[–] StillPaisleyCat@startrek.website 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

There was a reference in Discovery season one or two to SQL, as if it was cool. Sigh.

[–] bloopernova@programming.dev 50 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (9 children)

Lisp. All is Lisp.

Data's entire consciousness was written as an Emacs package.

Klingons program in Brainfuck. A Warrior's Language!

Vulcans exclusively use APL.

The F in Ferengi stands for Fortran.

Python is banned across the known galaxy. If your race is discovered using it, your planet is immediately bombarded until the entire crust is molten.

Cardassians use Haskell because they're evil.

[–] zeet@lemmy.world 38 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] bloopernova@programming.dev 18 points 1 year ago

Holy shit you win, lol

[–] shutz@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 year ago

That's what the Pakled use. The best of them actually use QuickBasic to "make it go faster".

[–] Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The F in Ferengi stands for Fortran.

If Ferengi were to use a language that old, you'd think it would be the COmmon Business-Oriented Language.

[–] MajorHavoc@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

Just to add - obviously all Ferengi programs run on a Blockchain, and are riddled with microtransactions.

[–] ZenkorSoraz@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] interolivary@beehaw.org 2 points 1 year ago

PHP was invented by a Pakled

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[–] directive0@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] bloopernova@programming.dev 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The reason has been purged, intentionally forgotten. Vulcans train their entire lives to take on a dangerous task: once every 66 years, the very best of the best view the reason why Python is banned. Once viewed, the Vulcan confirms that it is indeed a just and necessary action to ban the ancient language.

After the task is complete, the Vulcan goes utterly, irretrievably insane and dies mere hours later.

[–] Haywire@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

The Q continum uses forth.

[–] startrek@hub.hubzilla.de 3 points 1 year ago

@bloopernova Wouldn't the Vulcans prefer Prolog?

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[–] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 38 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] kool_newt@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

C will be swapped out function by function with Zig.

[–] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

In such a case, I suspect that Zig will be absorbed by C using a maneuver that I call "The Zig Zag". After all, C is eternal.

[–] kool_newt@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

Nooooooo~oooo~!!!!

[–] WhoRoger@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Have you seen how people do programming? We see lots of it in Voyager around holograms. It's basically today's AI programming assistants on steroids. everything probably uses some fucking 300 years JavaScript as a basis, and that's why everything keeps breaking all the time.

[–] TootSweet@lemmy.world 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I really want to see an episode of Lower Decks where the captain watches engineers write programs, comes to the conclusion that "programming is just talking to the computer -- I can do that" and fires all the engineers (or transfers them to other functions.)

[–] JWBananas@startrek.website 7 points 1 year ago

Thanks, I read it in Freeman's voice.

[–] djmarcone@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago

Yeah they just tell the computer what they want. They're prompt engineers hundreds of years in the future. Programming, replicator, holodeck, lights in the quarters, whatever. Makes you wonder what all the button pushing is on the bridge. Maybe because it's quieter than everyone talking over each other?

[–] MajorHavoc@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

Thank you for plausibly explaining every holodeck episode. That's canon for me now.

[–] Richard@startrek.website 2 points 1 year ago

This is simply too good...

[–] hamburglar26@wilbo.tech 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One million lines of BASIC!

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[–] OrganicMeatbag@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 year ago
[–] kool_newt@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
[–] xilliah@beehaw.org 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Honestly I've always imagined them using a more natural interface just like when they speak to the computer. So when they run commands it's essentially ai driven, and so is what they see on their screens. Why ever touch a piece of code when an ai can manage it for you and offers a natural interface with flexibility. It would simply be inefficient to do it any other way.

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[–] Xtallll@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 year ago

lieutenant commander data structures.

[–] ElGosso@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

The only example given on Memory Alpha is a decompiled section of StuxNet https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Programming_code so that implies that C and C++ are both still in use

[–] hglman@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

No, nothing on discovery is real.

[–] Moc@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

You know it’s JavaScript

[–] Flyberius@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Not a language, but isn't there some beta canon somewhere that states that LCARS is a derivative of Linux or something?

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[–] tobimai@startrek.website 4 points 1 year ago

Polarity reversal

[–] cerement@slrpnk.net 4 points 1 year ago
[–] michaelgemar@mstdn.ca 4 points 1 year ago

@ZenkorSoraz To paraphrase a developer from the ‘80s: “I don't know what the language of the future will look like, but I know it will be called Fortran.”

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Rust. Everything is eventually becoming crabs.

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