this post was submitted on 19 Feb 2024
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3 words: I am drunk
"How drunk are you?"
"Not enough to come in"
"Have you used our Workplace Wellness™ minibar?"
Lmao love the plot twist
"Currently having a beer tasting party at my place."
That was the actual response one time.
I've done this before to family members who want lifts on my day off. "Yeah sure. I've had a few pints but if you don't mind then I don't. Oh ok, no worries then, catch you soon."
That works so excellently for the military. You're technically able to be called back in at any time, but you're also allowed to drink when you could reasonably expect to have that time off.
And the clincher; you're not allowed to be drunk on duty, so they can't even say "no worries, I'll pick you up" without implicating whoever ordered you in
Unless it's an actual emergency and they can't get anyone better. In which case the whole drunk thing will be swept under the rug. Unless that causes an incident.