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This is a pretty unique answer. I'm sorry you and your friends had such bad experiences, but it's definitely good to have people to relate to.
I try to own it pretty hard these days. There's still a surprising amount of stigma around the actual facts of truama, despite the language of truama becoming mainstream and the effects of generational truama being a central theme in popular art for the last twenty years. People aren't embarrassed to say that they had a shit childhood or that something bad happened to them anymore. They're embarrassed that it isn't entirely in the past, that they show signs of traumatic things they haven't fully accepted as part of themselves. And they can't find people to relate to because they can't acknowledge an essential part of themselves. I try to turn that part of their life equation on its head: I immediately call out and identify with truama responses and patterns whenever I see them.
We should be friends lol.
Depends on point of view, some would say it's basically normal. I don't really put much on them for being intentionally bad, or even consciously bad.
But maybe that's just part of how messed up I got? I dunno.
At this point I'm still learning how to be a normal person, but I don't really blame them for how they think. I blame them more for never leaving their little religious matrix.
But I think part of it is just growing up in this region. Very conservative, and for them even admitting that there could be another explanation for anything is basically telling Satan "please drag me straight to the bottom of hell immediately".
More specifically, it's just religious trauma at this point, not physical abuse. Well, no more than the typical "spank the fuck outta yo kids" that most thumpers tend to believe.
Maybe that's just as bad in some ways though. I never felt hated or anything like that though, so I got that going for me. Which is nice.