drbollocks

my ex-boyfriend sam (19m) of a few years has been my longest relationship (as i’m still young). he ghosted me and i started to lose feelings for him. however, i still had hope.

he also “forgot” about me when he would give gifts to other people, wouldn’t mention me under “people he appreciates” but would mention everyone else, and wouldn’t even tell people abt me.

due to all this, i started to question actually being a lesbian who was only into guys because of comphet.

however, last night, when he finally saw my messages (he doesn’t use social media a lot), he apologized and said he should’ve done something other than ghost his gf. he agreed that we should break up, and said he was being this way due to mental health problems, and that if we got back together, he’d be a better bf.

he explained he still had feelings for me and would love to still be friends.

that’s when i realized that i had genuine feelings for him that were still there, not just comphet. i always loved him and felt sad when it seemed he didn’t love me the same way.

i understand he’s not ready for a relationship rn, and i think he should take his time. i also am not quite ready due to this being so recent and the fact that we haven’t done actual couple stuff in a while.

but after a while, when he gets better, hopefully we’ll still have feelings and both be good partners (better than we were then). after all, even if the not including me thing isn’t an excuse, the ghosting was due to poor mental health which he can’t control.

so i guess i’d also be biromantic with a preference for women.

i hope we can make this work >w<

my friend, since she found out I’m neurodivergent and hyperfixate, went from really liking me to pretending to like me.

she used to really value me, but now she doesn’t because i have autism and she doesn’t. idk how to feel, she rolls her eyes at me, gives me weird looks, and will just stare at me at times when i say something like “how was your day?” w/o responding.

i understand that she’s a sophomore who’s friends with my friend’s younger sibling, but it still sucks at any age.

besides all that, she has an odd sense of humor but is really nice. not only this, but has been my friend since middle school, and i dated her in sixth grade. she has always been christian, but she’s practicing it more and feels like she has to “repent for her sins” and whatever.

she used to be a lesbian and then genderfluid but now she’s cishet and idk if she’ll understand what i’m going through, i also hope she didn’t decide this due to christianity.

and the gender identity and pronouns jokes feel weird to me as an enby and a lesbian 😓

will this end up actually bad for me like those superevangelicals?

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/22468079

!conlang_ua@lemmy.blahaj.zone

!conlang_ua@lemmy.blahaj.zone

i love the idea of creating conlangs. i’ve experimented with the idea of them in years past but have never done anything with them, let alone created one.

i did create some toki pona-based ones as they consist of few words (~100) but i want to create ones that aren’t just based off toki pona.

some straight guy i was friends with was obsessed with me. he only cared if i liked men and had a bf for some reason, and would ignore that i liked women. he would act like i was straight and that if i dated women, that just meant i was single and obviously interested in him.

a lot of the time, i’m either busy doing something where i literally cannot respond or overstimulated.

when i’m overstimulated, i physically cannot talk or barely register what someone’s saying. i also have trouble understanding out loud speech for some reason, where i’m listening but can’t process the words.

when my sister asks or says something, i often ask her to repeat it because it’s a lot of information. she says something like “never mind, you don’t care anyway, it’s not important” when i ask to be repeated.

she doesn’t care when i told her why i need it to be repeated.

she also thinks i’m mad at her all the time, gets frustrated when i don’t talk (because im incapable), and starts talking badly about herself when i don’t laugh at her humor (which consists of loud screeching and tiktok “brainrot” words)

since then, i decided to feign laughter so she’ll not think i’m upset with her.

i do try to be there for my sister, but there’s times where i cannot or just can’t talk.

i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me bc he realized he's gay (im a woman). i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked to have a man that treats me right instead of the other guy that ghosted me, and also to make him happy.

he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his gf of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

i know someone who is a native russian speaker and said they were “eating lunch” at 5pm despite already having eaten lunch. i was confused, and either figured they were having a second or late lunch, when i found this:

how could you tell, since npd is an actual condition, so of course they’ll act differently, but it’s used so often to describe a regular, typical asshole.