this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2023
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Not The Onion

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[–] keenkoon@lemmy.world 44 points 1 year ago (2 children)

the cocaine bear sequence we needed

[–] FlashZordon@lemmy.world 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The Cocaine Cinematic Universe getting spicy. Cocaine Bear vs Cocaine Shark in the works.

[–] teft@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And the 3rd movie is about Cocaine Sharknado.

[–] FlashZordon@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Cocaine Bear and Cocaine Shark will definitely have to team up to take it down.

[–] PrincessLeiasCat@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I would watch this. Probably multiple times.

[–] BrooklynMan@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There’s already a movie called Cocaine Shark. It’s on Tubi.

[–] keenkoon@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

yes!!! Now we just need cocaine sharknado

[–] WackyTabbacy42069@reddthat.com 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

This is the prequel to the movie Jaws. While sharks only kill like 10 people a year, cocaine shark will justify our shark-fears

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

humans have really fucked up this planet

[–] lntl@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I get "crack baby" vibes from this piece

[–] LemmySoloHer@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

"Crack Baby Shark" would be a good title for a mashup of the Crack Baby cadence and the song Baby Shark.

[–] Shialac@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So we now get another shitty movie from a single line of newspaper?

[–] MudSkipperKisser@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Personally I can’t wait

[–] ahbi_santini@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Experts says a lot of shit

[–] ngdev@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

sharks could be feasting on bales of hallucinatory drugs

Yes, cocaine. The psychedelic.

[–] totallynotarobot@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Is it cocaine, or “hallucinatory drugs”? This article seems to think those are the same thing.

This reporter clearly does not know how to do drugs right. They should go chill with some coked up sharks to learn the ways.