That, unfortunately, does not sound like an Onion headline.
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Fair enough. I originally figured the absurdity of the situation might be enough to push it over the line, but on second thought, it probably needs another bit of absurdity or irony to really sound like an Onion headline.
If there's a consensus that it doesn't belong, I'll delete it.
I don't think it's worth deleting necessarily. I was just making a jab of my own.
It does sound like FloridaMan however. Florida... Child?
It certainly does after reading the other headline about the 3 yo shooting the 1 yo with a gun. This seems satirical of that headline while being real.
Negligent parents/adult permits a child kill another
Do golf carts have hand controls for throttle? How does a 3 year old even physically reach the go pedal and steer otherwise?