this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2024
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LinkedinLunatics

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A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

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[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 6 points 2 days ago

This is fucking based as all hell

[–] _bcron_@lemmy.world 135 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Props to anyone who can laugh at themselves over something like this, although it might be the kind of attitude that got him in that pickle in the first place

[–] krashmo@lemmy.world 29 points 3 days ago

Yeah that salami really rubbed against that pickle...

I thought that was going to be just a food pun but when I was done writing it out it felt more sexual than culinary. Whatever, I'm leaving it.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The question is whether it's tongue in cheek, or if he's genuinely that terrified of having a gap in his resumé...

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 24 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Jesus christ, the people on this platform...

Do you really think they're keeping the fact they've been to prison on the down low? It's a joke at their own expense.

[–] voracitude@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

What's kind of funny about this response is that the other post reads like a deadpan joke, to me, based on the premise there is no limit to the crazy you can find on LinkedIn.

[–] YurkshireLad@lemmy.ca 47 points 4 days ago

The one thing you don't want to announce before going to prison is "I'm happy to share!".

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 36 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Actually kinda brilliant the level of self awareness here.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago

Lemmites genuinely cannot comprehend satire, can they?

It's worse than Reddit.

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 37 points 4 days ago

hope those comments are wishing him a long career at Cumberland

[–] Bilbo_Haggins@lemm.ee 24 points 3 days ago

"Michelle Bond and her co-conspirator romantic partner attempted to fund her campaign for the U.S. House of Representatives by illegally using hundreds of thousands of dollars from corporate coffers, among other sources, and then lying to Congress and others to cover it all up," U.S. Attorney Damian Williams said.

The pair met in June 2021, according to prosecutors, and they have a young child together."

Holy fuck that child is going to have a fucked up childhood. I am so sorry, kid.

[–] AFC1886VCC@reddthat.com 4 points 3 days ago
[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 131 points 4 days ago

Can't have a gap on a resume...

[–] GBU_28@lemm.ee 76 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Totally with this. It's hilarious.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I exhaled slightly through my nose

[–] AnxiousOtter@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

The greatest of compliments.

[–] itsathursday@lemmy.world 27 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I don't know how Linkdin does these things, but is it possible that he just updated his job title as "inmate" and "Place of work" or whatever to FCI Cumberland and that the system did the rest, generating the sentence and adding the image? Or did he have to type it all out himself?

[–] Dragonstaff@leminal.space 17 points 3 days ago

100% the first one, but absolutely hilarious in any case.

[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The toxic positivity of LinkedIn continues.

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 3 points 2 days ago

There's nothing toxic about making a joke at your own expense.

[–] 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

License plate making is a bit too crypto-adjacent in my opinion /s

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago

Metal stamping is a good way to protect seed phrases from fire.

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

I'll bet his mom is super proud.