Feddit.de runs well on a hetzner 2core, 4gig ram vps. (Single-core felt a bit sloppy, so go for 2+ cores.)
As for the distro, doesn't really make much of a difference, as lemmy is run in docker containers
this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2023
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Sopuli also runs on a VPS of similar specs with Ubuntu, and again a Linux distribution doesn't really matter.
You can just take the smallest vps available and it will be sufficient, unless your instance is very large. For distributions Ubuntu or Debian should be easiest.