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Mike Johnson Admits He and His Son Monitor Each Other's Porn Intake in Resurfaced Video
(www.rollingstone.com)
this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2023
473 points (96.5% liked)
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Wtf how is the onion supposed to keep up with this shit
By waiting until people are used to their shit and posting completely normal stories about them. No one would believe them.
"Republican has a change of heart when their 12 year old daughter gets pregnant, now supports abortion. "
No, I think that one's fairly common. So is just "Republican gets pregnant, now supports abortion - but only for her specific circumstances".
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god these people are fucking weird. so fucking weird.
You spelled weird wrong.
It's spelled, *psycho.
I remember this kind of stuff back from my days as an evangelical Christian...they applaud this kind of nonsense, even though every single one of the users of this kind of software has some way around it. Purity culture craziness.
he installed “accountability software” called Covenant Eyes on his devices in order to abstain from internet porn
Covenant Eyes sounds like some Handmaid's Tale shit.
Hey, I have a local cult that uses that software.
https://www.dwellchurchcolumbusisacult.com/
They also like to pack a bunch of students into one apartment and then charge each of them $700*/month in rent.
*(Don't take my word on the numbers.)
Oh wow, I didn't know Xenos Church changed their name. Trying to mask themselves with a name change.
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I swear, every week I see an article that makes me say, "oh shit, The Handmaid's Tale is starting"
Next step up from using confession material for blackmailing parishioners
I get that lots of jokes are to be made about the porn part but what really should be concerning everyone is that the current Speaker of the House pays a third party to snoop on every aspect of his phone.
Was he using his personal phone for any of his duties in Congress?
Is he still using this phone with even more potentially secret government information as a member of the Gang of 8?
This is a MASSIVE security risk, who the fuck knows what information this Covenant Eyes “company” is now privy to.
ETA: From a Wired article from Sept 2022: https://www.wired.com/story/covenant-eyes-anti-porn-accountability-monitoring-apps/
"But Covenant Eyes and Accountable2You do much more than just police pornography. When WIRED downloaded, decompiled, and tested Covenant Eyes and Accountable2You, we found that both apps are built to collect, monitor, and report all sorts of innocent behavior. The applications exploited Android’s accessibility permissions to monitor almost everything someone does on their phone. While the accessibility functionalities are meant to help developers build out features that assist people with disabilities, these apps take advantage of such permissions to either capture screenshots of everything actively being viewed on the device or detect the name of apps as they’re being used and record every website visited in the device’s browser."
Emphasis mine. This is exactly what I'm talking about. Dude has this software on every one of his devices and now the Christofascists behind Covenant Eyes and any one willing to hack them, ie foreign governments, has screenshots of everything he is viewing. Massive massive security risk.
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Is porn intake measured in sieverts or mW/cm² or what?
What level is considered safe?
Asking for a friend.
Npps aka Naked People Per Second
Not to be confused with NiPS. (Nipples per second) Which indicates how many definitely female nipples are in view per second. This is a better metric as many scenes are shown with partial clothing and therefore don't get counted in the NPPS metric correctly.
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Pretty sure it's millipervs.
With this guy, it's more like megapervs.
The equivalent of 3 McDonald’s cheeseburgers consumed in their playground ball pit per week
I think the SI unit is faps but the Americans still use yanks.
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Same software the Duggar pedo used?
abuse software for abusers
Ok, how many burner phones does he have?
Dude, I'm willing to bet the son has at least one.
"I’m proud to tell ya, my son has got a clean slate."
A quote like this tempts fate. I thought he was trying to avoid temptation.
So what you're telling me is, that Johnson and his little Johnson measure the usage of each other's Johnsons?
There is no normal, only weird and weirder. Beware the normies, for they are least normal of us all.
As a parent, thats just some shit you don't wanna know. Like idgaf if its furry or scat shit keep it to yourself, kid.
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Mike Johnson is a walking argument for voting against 70+ year-old geriatrics who can't string together coherent sentences.
All it takes is one exceedingly unlucky accident and that motherfucker becomes president.
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Isn't this the kind of thing TOR and a private browsing session was made for? Additionally this is just bizarre.
Maybe it's a way to make sure they don't forget. Like "oh hey bro i saw u had some lewds in ur history make sure u go incognito next time" "Damn u right man good lookin out" fist bump
Its really creepy and intrusive. But at the same time, I can find really fucked up porn with literally zero effort.
I mean, if your kid has terrabytes of rough incest bdsm porn people will ask why you werent monitoring their internet use, but monitoring them like this feels like a different kind of weird.
Shit, if your kid has terabytes of train videos you need to intervene. Terabytes of any specific thing and... son we need to talk
Thats what I mean, how do you know unless you're either using this shit or searching the HDD. I was a kid back when porn was Jpgs traded on floppy disks or grainy 480x320 10 second realplayer clips.
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Nothing creepy about that
It must be that software that you install that lets your "accountability buddy" check your browsing activity.
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