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I had 2 interventions in my life and neither worked. In fact, they made it much worse for me.
I suggest that you go to AlAnon and learn a bit about alcoholism before trying anything (btw, AlAnon is not AA, but is a program to help non-alcoholics understand what they're dealing with.)
Your friend is lucky to have you. Don't give up on them. It truly is hellish.
I’ve found with my own addictions that forcibly stopping one just causes a different one to start up.
The real solution for me has been healing trauma, resulting in baseline consciousness not being painful.
Most alcoholics use alcohol to run from difficult, unprocessed emotions. I was one of them.
AA always gave off bad vibes to me because of the whole "surrender to a higher power" shtick
Lots of secular AA groups out there
It’s hard to know which are really secular. Some folks think that calling it “a higher power” makes it secular. A fig leaf over the word “god” doesn’t do it for me.
Same, but the community was great. Being around people that understand is so beneficial.
Absolutely. There has to be some little glimmer of already wanting to quit for them to take the help seriously. I would absolutely recommend AlAnon as well. You can't just force someone into treatment, and that's pretty much what interventions try to do, on top of making the person feel guilt and shame which likely is why they drink in the first place. Being able to have a one on one, calm conversation about how the person is affecting themselves and others is probably a good route, because people often do not recognize they have a problem in the first place. It would not be surprising for it to end with the person getting angry and storming out, but it plants the seed in a more reasonable way than having everyone they know cornering them, humiliating them, and saying "go to rehab now or we never speak to you again."
Source: in recovery, worked in the field.
I quit smoking years ago and I really felt like the world wanted me to quit. Indoor smoking at restaurants was being banned. No more smoking section on flights. Movies were no longer depicting everyone with a cigarette in their mouth all the time like they did in the 60s. Many hotels stopped offering smoking rooms. Nicotine patches and gum were available to help.
I felt like trends in the world were behind me and it helped.
Alcohol is a totally different story. Alcohol is not being banned. It is still something almost everyone does. It is allowed at restaurants and virtually everywhere else. Everyone I know drinks. They haven’t cracked down on advertising in the same way. Hotel rooms have booze in the room for you. Airlines bring you drinks. There are no OTC quitting aids.
If someone has an alcohol problem and needs to quit, they’re really going to have a much harder time than quitting smoking.
Unfortunately, the medications that help with alcohol withdrawal are somewhat dangerous in their own right and need to be fairly tightly controlled. Delirium tremens (the shakes) from withdrawal are usually managed with benzodiazepines like Valium for emergent use and Ativan for prolonged control. The other main maintenance drug for alcohol withdrawal is Librium, and that one is also a benzodiazepine. It would be amazing if there were safe OTC options, but because of the serious damage alcohol does and the dangerous nature of withdrawal from it, it really needs to be closely medically managed. Opiate withdrawal sucks....alcohol withdrawal can very easily kill you outright.
Don't do one of those "5vs1" interventions! All it will do is make your friend think you are "ganging up" on him. Talk with him one on one, make your other friends do the same with some time in between.
Why privacy matters, reason #854203
Exactly. "I have nothing to hide". No shit. They know more than you
You think i close the door on the bathroom because shitting is illegal?
Best way to reply to that
Happened to me when I quit drinking. It was so engaging. Suddenly every other ad online is for hard liquor, too drastic to have been a lot of coincidences lining up.
It's less Google fault directly, more that finding sobriety terms is part of the alcohol manufacturers SEO/ad words strategy. Which is absolutely disgusting.
We can still blame google for not low prioritizing alcohol ads when people search for sobriety.
The level of advertising on the internet is why I haven't been without an adblocker since the early 2000's. And when the ads aren't displayed, you also get to see just how much god damn space is devoted to them, with all the now empty space left on any given page.
Few pages legit break apart without any ad containers
Just as a note to OP, some levels of alcohol addiction are so deep that they cannot be halted at once without risk to the addict’s health or even life. If you suspect your friend could be that far gone, it requires medical intervention.
Gonna hijack this comment to say I was a major alcoholic drinking bottles of vodka every day, always drinking. Never not drinking. You get the idea. A real piece of shit. Anyway I got drunk and did a bunch of acid my friend had and decided while totally fucked on it that I had to quit. A few days later after talking to some family I called my doctor and he referred me to a nearby hospital with a separate chemical dependency area and they helped me medical detox (outpatient at home) and it is the single best thing I ever did for myself. 7 and a half years sober. Life has only got better since then. I had almost nothing, barely showed up to work, blew all my money on alcohol and other drugs, and now after years of hard work I own my own small business and am doing well for myself.
Anyone currently struggling with alcoholism, ask some friends and family for help, speak to your doctor, and get better. You know you want to.
The founder of Alcoholics Anonymous considered LSD to be a great tool to help alcoholics recover. Thank goodness you had that LSD! It changed your life!
https://www.theguardian.com/science/2012/aug/23/lsd-help-alcoholics-theory
Don't take it as an instruction to do LSD as a way to stop addiction - follow instruction given to you by a doctor first
Don't listen to what AA says tho. They are religious nuts and their practices have no basis in science.
Congratulations on those 7.5 years! What a great story.
Sorry for spamming, i already wrote this in response to another comment, but i kind of find this important for everyone:
First thing everyone should do on a new phone ( or old phone, any phone )
go to Internet & Network Settings
Enter "dns.adguard.com" for Private DNS
Profit: never see ads anywhere on your phone. Not in apps and in no browser.
It's as simple as that. That's all you need, in order too block ads globally.
Iirc there are different DNS servers from adguard with custom filters. Some are more strict and others more loose on the blocking.
This instruction is for Android, since it's what i use, but I'm sure, similar setting exists in iOS.
It should be noted that setting Adguard as your DNS will allow Adguard to track the domains you visit. The latest info I can find is that a lot of their team is still located in Russia, which makes them susceptible to government demands regardless of their intentions.
DNS adblocking should be the last resort. On Android there are many ways to do system wide local adblocking (with and without root). Don't know about iOS. Alternatively you can do network level blocking with something like a pi-hole.
Alcoholic here. Super bowl ads are toxic. All hail the protective ad blocker.
The amount of alcohol and gambling ads seem to have shot threw the roof over the last few months. I'm not a fan.
"Why should I care about privacy? I have nothing to hide, who cares if they target advertising at me?"
Not to make light of your situation, but if anyone in the crowd has said this to themselves at some point, the answer to why they should care is "shit like exactly this." This is a prime example of "not illegal stuff to hide but targeted advertising actively making your life harder purposefully in an attempt to manipulate you into buying their products."
Take back your privacy, use alternate solutions and avoid shit tier companies that attempt to take it from you for their own financial gain, even at the expense of your own financial ruin. Make "unsecure" a black mark companies have to crawl their way out of or else their products won't be used or bought. Fuck them. Is it possible to gain 100% anonymity online? Likely, no, but you can put in a little effort to stop it as much as you can, and use adblockers of course to block what they would send. There is effort to it to be sure, but it is worth it, and the more people take their privacy seriously the more tools will be developed, improved, etc.
Again sorry to sort of hijack your post for this comment, that sucks and fuck whoever is serving you (and by extension actual alcoholics seeking recovery) those targeted ads. I just feel it's necessary to point out real world examples of "this is why" because when you're just talking about privacy as a concept people always pretend that since they aren't a Sicario for Sinaloa they have no reason to care. You do, something as "small" (legal) as this is a reason.
Your friend is lucky to have you. Good luck, I hope everything works out for the best.
You guys are getting ads?
If you don't block ads and you type things into searches about alcohol you will indeed get a lot of alcohol ads. The thing is though, I never got them as frequently when I was still drinking, or maybe never noticed them. Also I once got served ads for beer on a page about quitting booze lol, it seems pretty intentional even though it's most likely not that targeted.
Make a new account on Instagram and see how much of it is pedo shit on a new feed. Everything is out of control.
How about I don't
Good plan.
Gambling and alcohol ads have to be among the most unethical form of marketing in existence, yet, it really is everywhere. These companies (Google/Meta/Twitter) are even showing these ads to minors on an ongoing basis.
I couldn't imagine being an addict or former addict and having to be exposed to this mindfuck.
I would encourage everyone to actively find ways to block ads, even if solely to preserve one's mental health.
Gambling is the one that is so infuriating for me as well, and part of the reason I don't watch sports at all now.
They have sponsored segments IN THE SHOW during the game talking about the current odds and bets that can be placed. In addition to all the signs and ad segments. It is so terrible in Ontario once online gambling ads were legalized.
It's just as if announcers were consuming alcohol or smoking on set with a bottle or pack of it in front of them. Gambling should be illegal or heavily regulated just the same as other addictive substances.
Oh man, this sounds like it could become a news piece.
Sounds shit and you probably should install some kind of adblock.
Hope things go well and your friend is receptive to the message. It might not change the trajectory right away but at the very least, it'll be something to encourage them to examine their habits. If your friend does seem to take it to heart but has a hard time cutting back, there's a medication called naltrexone which may help reduce alcohol cravings. I'm just some internet guy though so that's more of a conversation between them and their doctor, it's something I didn't know about before starting treatment but I think it was helpful. Carbonated (seltzer/sparkling) water was useful as a replacement for the alcoholic drinks in my case but if that brings to mind stuff they used to mix together, it may not be an ideal solution.
If they've been drinking heavily over a long period, there are also some risks associated with complete cessation so it couldn't hurt to encourage them to schedule an appointment with their doctor anyway. I'd imagine that's come up in your research already though.
Facebook briefly offered you the option to select topics you didn't want to see advertised at all, I chose alcohol and politics. Want to guess what 90% of my ads on that garbage site are?
Interesting. I live in Poland and liquor advertisements are illegal here, in fact all alcoholic beverage commercials are banned except for beer (I think even with that there used to be some restrictions that in tv they can be only aired after 23:00 or 11 PM, I'm not sure if it's still the case). According the law definition, it should also apply to social media and internet in general, but it might or might not be completely regulated (yet?). In general however, I don't see such adverts and even beer adverts are quite rare, to the point that I forgot they could exist, just like cigarettes commercials.
Last beer advert I remember was some some billboard with 0% Free beer with raspberry flavor or whatever
That's why I use NextDNS. It's like Pi-Hole, but better IMO.