I'm not sure whether or not this was supposed to be a joke post, but I recently had a colonoscopy, and everyone was super nice and fully aware that this was an embarrassing procedure, so they did their best to make it as pleasant as you can be in a surgical waiting area.
this post was submitted on 23 Aug 2023
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I felt myself falling asleep, then seemingly immediately blink awake. I said, "Doc, I don't think the anesthesia is working," and he said, "Ha, no man, we're done."
Like you said, the prep was the worst part. There is no joy in daily living without food.
Mine too! Then i said, "It wasn't that bad. I can't believe i stressed over it for so long," and he said, "Yep! You should have come in 32 years ago." And that was the most uncomfortable part of it.
"You won't find anything. The IRS was pretty thorough."
Ha. Good one. Take my upvote and thank you for your service.
I lost my wallet, keep an eye out please.
Ask them if they'll be shooting in hidef 4k or IMAX.
"My safe word is pineapple"
Put a joke on a post it note and place it between your butt cheeks.
I had to get my ass checked and the doctor was surprised at my lack of shame or discomfort with it. When it was over he said "don't come back just for this okay?"
You're going to want to avoid looking like a huge ass. I'd avoid jokes that shit on their career choice.
Bravo.
With your rectum. The man sees you crush a piece of ice with that sphincter, you command some respect for the rest of the procedure.
Call me a good girl, daddy.
The genders will be the other way around, but I like the cut of your jib.
Tell him sorry you ate some bad Indian (or some other spicy food known for loose bowls) food last night.
They'd probably cancel the appointment if I said that, not gonna wait another 3 months to try to book my favorite activity.
Keep an eye out for our next president.
Puppet Show?
one holds the ice pick, the other bangs with the mallet
The benefit of accidental lobotomy is that the patient won't remember.
I'm ready for my close-up
Ask them if they're going to buy you dinner first.
Ask them what their Twitch handle is because your friends want to watch the live-stream.
Colonoscopy is easy, it's endoscopy that felt like near dear experience (I didn't take the sedative= fail). Worth it though. Also the Dr's and techs were far to busy talking about the next hairpin bend like they were rally driving. The satnav on the screen shows how far the scope has gone, I shit you not it really looks like the old Nokia snake gane. And when you have nitrous gas it all becomes very funny.
I once woke up during an upper endoscopy. It wasn't a pleasant experience. The anesthesiologist noticed pretty fast though and put me back out.
Tell them if they find $2.10 worth of nickels, they’ll have almost recovered it all.
Do a few shots with them.
I have a colonoscopy tomorrow, so I'm definitely going to use one of these!
You won't need to break the ice when your ass squirts shit water allover his hand and bed
Heck, it was basically all water by that point, 24 hours of laxatives will do that ;)
Potable even.