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Is just too much to handle and if it ends bad feels like a death sentence
Don't put that much importance on dates. You'll stress yourself out and if your date gets even a whiff of you making it into a big deal it's going to put stress on them as well. I dated for years before meeting my significant other. Some were good, most were meh and some were bad. Almost all the bad dates were either me or the other person taking the date too seriously and not really opening up to participate.
I used to set up dates in restaurants/museums/parks etc. I wanted to visit. First of all it gave me some idea of who I'm meeting because I would discuss with them what places on my list would also interest them. And it also doubled as a way to get something out of the date if it was a bust, at the very least I would be able to enjoy the atmosphere.
You don't go into it looking to find a loneliness cure, you go into it looking to make a new friend. Maybe that friend can be more, but maybe not. The worst case scenario is the same as not trying, a decent outcome is a new friend (which can lead to expanding your pool of datable people!), and maybe you find a partner along the way.
I've been married for about a decade now, what I miss most about the dating scene is all the new friends I'd make and experiences I'd have.
I honestly don't want friends. I just don't wanna socialise, is just too much for me, I want to be engaged with a single woman and maybe create a family in a far future. That's it
Yes, it's inconvenient but how is your future SO going to meet you if stay at home? She's probably unsocial like you but you could still meet her family or friends by dating eventually leading to her.
Of course you could try your luck staying online too but I'd suggest something else than niche platforms where tech enthusiasts are overrepresented like the Fediverse.