this post was submitted on 06 Jul 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost
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Every. Single. Post.
"You need a divorce. This is gaslighting and abuse. He/She does not respect you as a woman/man."
I remember this one post where a guy asked his girlfriend if she would bite the bullet and help the women in his very conservative family cook Thanksgiving dinner once per year. He was super apologetic but explained that the women in the family got super pissed and offended by women not cooking. He had already tried talking to them and they weren't having it. He was between a rock and a hard place. Clearly he didn't know what to do.
Reddit flipped their shit and said the guy had to choose between his girlfriend and his family. Obviously I am against traditional, conservative, gender-role bullshit. But I have dealt with plenty of shit to have a good relationship with my wife's imperfect family. And she has dealt with tons of shit to put up with my imperfect family. A good relationship is two people who do things for the other person. It's reciprocal and kind, even in unpleasant situations. This guy didn't choose his family and he won't change them. All they can do is choose to do it differently in their own house and raise their children differently.
I hate the relationship subreddits. Hot garbage.
They should get a divorce. He obviously secretly believes in traditional gender roles being followed, and is trying to manipulate her into it with bullshit excuses. No other scenario is possible, no nuances are possible either. Everything is right or wrong.
This is sarcasm, just in case anyone wasn't sure :)
Personally, I loved them because they were entertaining. They were also useful, but not for getting advice. They were great for getting other perspectives and for thought experiments where you can think about how your would react.
But the worst IMO were the ones that got upset when OP wasn't just doing what they said like it was a choose your own adventure story. Some would get fucking indignant about it and it didn't help that some subs had rules against arguing (like AITA, entertaining but horribly run with some strong but competing biases making judgements overall useless, including comments frequently making shit up that wasn't in the post to base their judgements on). OP is the only one that understands the greater context of their issue, plus is the one that needs to be convinced, they should be encouraged to argue if they don't agree, not discouraged.