this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2024
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I always considered marriage the epitome of feeling connected: you share a life with a partner and maybe even have children. Society at least acts like it is.

I have a coworker in his 40s, conservative and Christian, married to a woman holding a job, he is also employed and has a good job, all things considered and they have a child.

I don't see this person much but each time he sees me he approaches to basically complain and rant, mostly about democrats and foreigners, getting very emotional to the point of crying.

At first I hated him for spewing so much shit, but now I think I'm starting to pity him: he has a job, is married to a working woman, they have a child, they are homeowners... and he still feels angry and needs to rant to feel good. It's like he's angry at everything.

Which takes me to think, maybe there are things men need emotionally that women cannot provide, but I couldn't write a list.

What are some of these connections men need out of a marriage?

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[โ€“] Ziggurat@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

There is people in unhappy marriage. Who sometimes sacrified their own life for their marriage and kids and end up living with someone they don't love anymore (if they ever did) and no social life on their own.

[โ€“] The_v@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

From what I have seen, unhappy marriages are very common in highly religious/conservative groups.

Most of these groups have stupid "No Sex before marriage" rules. So two horny young adults (teenagers in some cases) get married quickly. Pregnancy follows immediately and they start being parents before they are fully mature.

Fast forward 5-6 years later and they don't even like each other anymore. The smart ones do the adult decision and divorce.

Way too many of them live misery constantly bickering while claiming to be "happily married" because "divorce is a sin". They then spend most of their time complaining about their spouses. The kids of course have all sorts of baggage from growing up in the toxic environment.