this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2024
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Funny

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[–] teft@lemmy.world 80 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Isn't one of their big rules "Be fruitful and multiply"?

I take that to mean getting railed in sundresses is perfectly christian.

[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

And the Lord commandeth, "Go forth and do some ho shit"

[–] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"Do some shit" definitely implies anal.

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"Go fourth" suggests a group setting.

[–] msage@programming.dev 6 points 6 months ago

'Go forth and receive eternal life.'

But John came fifth and won a toaster.

[–] shadearg@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)
[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

And by be fruitful and multiply he clearly meant, only having sex with the lights out, under the covers, in the missionary position, for the sole purpose of procreation.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Also female orgasm is a sin, she's basically whore then and probably would also enjoy it with others

[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Not just a sin, but also a myth. Only men can orgasm!

[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 14 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Who was that Republican dude whose wife said something like women don't orgasm and a women getting wet is a medical issue? That poor girl.

[–] medgremlin@midwest.social 12 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That was Ben Shapiro's wife who, I believe, is a physician. She's got some interesting cognitive dissonance going on.

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I personally know a gynecologist who, in her thirties, was still uneducated on the wonders of receiving oral sex, on the existence of the G spot, etc. Apparently they don't really have time for that sort of stuff in the cursus in a lot of countries. Sexual health doesn't include pleasure, it seems.
Which is to say, unless it comes from personal experience, they won't be advocating for that sort of stuff.
So it makes perfect sense if that lady is a strict Christian who married her "first love" and isn't really a medical gynecologist and he's the typical "i need a wife who's a virgin so I'll never gave to make an effort because she'll never know any better" dude. That poor woman should shut the fuck up though.

[–] Cignul9@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago

Ben Shapiro. That poor dude’s wife.

[–] andrewta@lemmy.world 15 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Only if it involves getting nailed while on a cross

Yeah I'm going to hell.

[–] Beardedsausag3@kbin.social 11 points 6 months ago

I'll keep you company, I laughed

[–] Marin_Rider@aussie.zone 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

imagine getting nailed so hard they make 4 extra holes

[–] joshoff@lemmynsfw.com 1 points 6 months ago

A night with my ex and our buddies