this post was submitted on 02 Dec 2023
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[–] flicker@kbin.social 13 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Something one might propose to build in Night Vale.

[–] acastcandream@beehaw.org 6 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Please do not disregard the obsidian sphere in the Night Vale public swimming pool. Make sure to give it all due attention. But not too much attention, so as to make things weird. Too little attention, unfortunately, will also bring about its ire, and we all remember what happened last time. Simply apply the recommended amount of regard to its ominous, strangely comforting hum, as it gently lulls you to sleep.

And now: the weather.

[–] flicker@kbin.social 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Wow. Nice to meet you, Cecil. Big fan. Please don't ask me to work as an intern.

[–] acastcandream@beehaw.org 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Nice to meet you, Big Fan. There are many properties of your anatomy I believe the sheriff’s secret police would find useful. I’ll recommend you to their internship program, which is compulsory and slightly moist.

[–] ook_the_librarian@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There have been reports of a large black orb near the dog park. Ignore them. There is no orb. Nor is there a dog park. Besides, mysterious, humming orbs are nothing to worry about anyway. So why are you bothered by these reports? And now, the weather:

[–] flicker@kbin.social 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

In fact, I would much rather live in a community where a wholesome, humming orb would be a welcome sight. If people report every single ominous orb that they see, why, there would be less majesty in this world. That sounds like the kind of austere, silent community that Desert Bluffs wants to be, and do we really want that to be the place we call home, dear listener?

[–] ook_the_librarian@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Come to think of it, just who are these people who would busy themselves submitting frivolous reports an ominous orb? Could it be Jan? Jan, who takes it upon themselves to scold the children for looking at the solar eclipse? What else don't you want us to see, Jan?