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I'm terrified of heights. No one knows. I'm great at faking it.
So am I. I took rock climbing lessons. It was one of the hardest things I ever did. Eventually I lost the fear and felt awesome. Stopped climbing for years and now it's back. Fuck.
That is interesting how it went away and came back. Putting me on a ladder almost paralyzes me. I have to block the world out and focus on breathing in order to finish the task I got up there to do. .
Exposure treatment works. It sucks but it works. You just have to keep chiseling at it slowly but constantly. If you keep it up for long enough you will realize that feeling is almost gone when exposed to heights. The key here is being relentless at exposing yourself to what scares you (safely). In my mind, I just thought my brain was getting bored with always being scared and it just kinda went away. About a year in I went from not being able to walk on the hallway of the 4th floor of my college building to actually sitting on the railing (like everyone else). The thing is I wasn't faking not being scared. I was genuinely not scared.
That was me too. Now I'm good up to about 2 stories high, which is how high the climbing gym was.
It was scary and there were definitely times I abandoned a climb because my legs wouldn't stop shaking, but you eventually learn to trust the ropes will save you and push through the fear. It was 100% worth it.
Why don't you tell people?
When I was a kid, when you told your fears, it was greeted with responses like, "that's silly, you'll get over it. Now get up that ladder and paint that wall. "
I see, that sucks. But maybe it's worth trying opening up again with certain people. Not everybody is like that.