Not The Onion

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A Man, Dual Wielding Raw Steaks, Slaps Diners In The Face At Vegan Restaurant Yelling; “If You Don’t Eat Your Meat, You Can’t Have Any Pudding!” (dailynewsreported.com)

submitted 1 year ago by TheOneWithTheHair@lemmy.world to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

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[–] johnthebeboptist@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I thought "not the onion" wasn't supposed to be satire, except I don't know if this even counts as satire, this is just dumb. Literally the same joke, every time.

[–] MercuryUprising@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is the sort of fantasy right wingers imagine themselves pulling off in the name... I dunno freedom?

[–] johnthebeboptist@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Exactly.

"Owning the [insert taste of the month]".

It's the same exact shit as "how can you tell someone's vegan? - THEY'LL TELL YOU ABOUT IT!!!, yet in my entire 30+ years of life I've never heard anyone ever say they're vegan or vegetarian or anything unless asked about, but I have a feeling I won't stop hearing someone announce that they eat meat AND MEAT ONLY or some shit like that until I die.

Shit got tired before it even started, because it's just the same old shit in a different wrapper.

[–] ReiRose@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Wait...I thought the onion was satire and 'not the onion' was news so pythonesque it looks like satire?

[–] johnthebeboptist@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

No that's it exactly, lol, we're getting lost in a jungle of double-negatives.

The Onion - satire
Not the Onion - things that happen that are so outlandish you'd think it is satire
This - Neither, cause it's someone making shit up, just some conservative asshole flogging the same dead horse with the same, tired old ~~stick~~ joke

[–] Blamemeta@lemmy.world -3 points 1 year ago

I thought the one joke was "I identify as an attack helicopter"