yak

47 x 100 as I recall from my days working in a Builders Merchant, still referred to as 'four by two' by builders though

Laughs in i3

Sets VPN to Ireland

It eats the wild haggis that stumble and fall into the Loch

Yeah, I might go and live in mainland Europe ... Oh, hang on ...

Ask them if they've ever watched Casino and smile

Governments selling shares in nationalised industries to the public ...

Piss off

40 days and 40 nights in the desert with no food and you reckon Jesus didn't rub one out to lift his mood, yeah, OK

England here, we invented this shit, sit down

Breaking wind when I cough

Same, it's a bit sad, but I've not used it for weeks and I'm certainly not going to start paying