this post was submitted on 03 Mar 2025
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politics

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top 26 comments
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[–] Punchshark@lemmy.ca 68 points 1 week ago

You elected a bunch of bitches and youre shocked when they act like the bitches they are

[–] KingGordon@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] dhork@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)
[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

So Ronald is the Hamburgler?

[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 week ago

Is musk a fry guy or Mayor McCheese?

[–] SOB_Van_Owen@lemm.ee 7 points 1 week ago

"To the juicing room..."

[–] runiq@feddit.org 2 points 1 week ago

inb4 grapist

oh, no, wait, that was the other one

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 31 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] foggy@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If I keep posting this every time there are egg related political news stories, maybe it'll come true?

I put together a little short story about how I would like to see Donald Trump meet his demise. Drowning in eggs:

The Eggsecution.

The once-proud leader, now stripped of title and dignity, stands in the center of the barren, concrete abyss. The abandoned Olympic swimming pool—thirty feet deep, dry as bone—has become their final stage. Above, the gathered masses stretch in every direction, a writhing sea of anticipation.

They do not jeer. They do not boo.

They simply chant.

"Eggs. Eggs. Eggs."

It starts as a murmur, a low thrum of human voices vibrating in unison. Then it grows, swelling into a deafening roar that rattles windows, that shudders in the bones of every person present. A chant as ancient as it is absurd, a single-minded invocation of punishment.

The first egg arcs high overhead, tracing a lazy curve before splattering against the fallen leader’s shoulder. The yolk bursts, oozing down his baggy, ugly, now-useless suit. A streak of yellow, the first of many.

Another egg. Then another.

Then dozens.

The first impacts make them flinch, stagger—hands raised in a futile shield. But soon there are too many to dodge, too many to deflect. They curl inward as the sky rains viscous judgment. The chant never stops.

"Eggs. Eggs. Eggs."

Shells crack. Yolk drips. The scent of sulfur and shame thickens in the stagnant air. It coats their skin, their hair, their pride, turning them into something less than human. Something… egg-like.

At the top of the pit, a child—no older than seven—steps forward. They hold their egg with both hands, cradling it like something precious. Reverent. With a deliberate motion, they lob it downward. It strikes the leader square on the forehead, exploding with an almost musical plap. The crowd erupts into a fresh crescendo of cheers, but the chant never falters.

"Eggs. Eggs. Eggs."

No escape. No reprieve. The pit is smooth concrete, slick now with raw egg and humiliation. They can do nothing but stand there, endure, become part of the ritual.

Somewhere in the throng, a vendor hawks boiled eggs. Another sells cartons to the unprepared. A man in a chicken suit waves encouragingly at the crowd.

The night wears on, but the spectacle does not end.

It cannot end.

Not until the last egg is thrown. Not until the last voice is hoarse.

Not until the world is rid of this one, failed leader, broken not by swords or exile, but by the inescapable weight of public yolk and scorn.

"Eggs. Eggs. Eggs."

[–] Broadfern@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If this isn’t already a copypasta it should be preserved as one. This is glorious

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

It is mine but I keep reposting it. That is the goal.

We can all do our part to make it a reality by getting our chant going whenever the pain of eggs strikes.

Copy it. Paste it. Or simply chant:

Eggs.

Eggs.

Eggs.

[–] MrVilliam@lemm.ee 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] stopdropandprole@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Eggs.

Eggs.

Eggs.

[–] SulaymanF@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago

Democrats SUCK at messaging. Republicans hammered Obama nonstop for a simple line about keeping your doctor under the ACA.

Democrats should be hammering this message daily in all media and they’re not? Why? Trump was right when he said he expected Democrats to fight him harder.

[–] andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wish him getting frequently egged in public.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 27 points 1 week ago

?

Bruh the rocks in the parking lot are free.

[–] DirkMcCallahan@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

Hillbilly Hypocrite

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 10 points 1 week ago

Because it never mattered to them anyway.

It's hilarious the parallels between their ignoring of this bird flu epidemic and the COVID pandemic.

[–] IcedSeraphine@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago

The whole admin needs deposed at the root.

[–] DogPeePoo@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

On this issue, you might say… he laid an egg

>

YEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!

[–] the_q@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago

I'm honestly so tired of hearing about goddamn eggs when EVERYTHING else is so much worse.

[–] _lilith@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It would be iconic if this man who rose to power on eggs was suddenly and relentlessly pelted by them

[–] nobody158@r.nf 5 points 1 week ago

Too bad we can't afford to buy the eggs to throw at him

[–] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

EGGS AND OIL NEED TO BE HIGH IN PRICE TO STOP CLIMATE CHANGE

Jesus you sound like fucking billionares complaining about high taxes. Or conservatives complaining about the price of gasoline going up.

This is a good thing. Stop fucking buying eggs. You don't need them.