It's an unfortunate turn of events, but the only way out now is to kill your coworker, assume his identity and marry his wife.
Them's the rules.
this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2024
65 points (94.5% liked)
TIFU
7894 readers
82 users here now
Welcome to TIFU.
This community will stand as a tribute to the fuck up in all of us. We all do something stupid from time to time, this is your place to share and laugh about it with folks on the internet!
Da Rules:
- Use proper formatting
A. All titles must start with TIFU.
B. All posts must have a TL;DR at the end. Some of us are too lazy to read your story, sorry.
C. Use the NFSW Tag, if a Post isn't Appropriate in General but still follows the rules. (Sex stories and etc.)
-
Posts must be about you.
-
Must be your fault.
-
A few things that aren't allowed.
A. No Rape/minors/bestiality. No death of animals. No glorification of major crimes.
B. Illegal activities that you glorify or giving advice on how to do something illegal.
-
Must be actual fuckups No humblebrags or stories that have zero consequences and don't go anywhere. Eg "TIFU by sexy sex". Moderator discretion.
-
Be civil and don't be disruptive No racism/bigotry/homophobia/transphobia. No personal attacks on other users, no name-calling. No low-effort "this didn't happen" type comments.
-
No Self Promotion No making posts with the express purpose of promoting your business/video game/porn career. Even if not mentioned within the text of the post, alluding to links on your profile is not allowed. This covers implying you will set up a stream/public link/onlyfans in the future, having set up one in the past, or anything along the lines of "upvote this comment if you want me to do this." These examples are by no means comprehensive, just don't self promote.
-
Mod Discretion Mods have the right to supersede any rule and make removals as we see fit, which may or may not be the rules listed in this community.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
You have to dock your penis tortellinis together, and create a ladsagna.
Thank you, Doctor. I'll bring it up when I see them in the coffee queue.
FUCK
Next time you see him get in his face and tell him he deserved it.
"Are you fucking sorry?!"
Sounds like the rules are there for a reason.
"THAT'S WHAT YOU FUCKING GET"
...my insubordinate foreskin had sealed itself up into a penis tortellini.
Hahahah.
My neighbour is covered in my piss. What the fuck do you do to survive this.
AHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHAHHHHAAAAHAHAHAHAAH
It's better to be pissed off than pissed on
The victim is probably both
Depends what you are into, but those are still wise words. Perhaps I'll get them on a plaque above the crime scene.
(sideways)
What the hell is even that?!