Good luck. We have totally credible intel from NORAD that Santa's max speed is faster than starlight.
this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2023
304 points (94.7% liked)
NonCredibleDefense
6637 readers
1554 users here now
A community for your defence shitposting needs
Rules
1. Be nice
Do not make personal attacks against each other, call for violence against anyone, or intentionally antagonize people in the comment sections.
2. Explain incorrect defense articles and takes
If you want to post a non-credible take, it must be from a "credible" source (news article, politician, or military leader) and must have a comment laying out exactly why it's non-credible. Low-hanging fruit such as random Twitter and YouTube comments belong in the Matrix chat.
3. Content must be relevant
Posts must be about military hardware or international security/defense. This is not the page to fawn over Youtube personalities, simp over political leaders, or discuss other areas of international policy.
4. No racism / hatespeech
No slurs. No advocating for the killing of people or insulting them based on physical, religious, or ideological traits.
5. No politics
We don't care if you're Republican, Democrat, Socialist, Stalinist, Baathist, or some other hot mess. Leave it at the door. This applies to comments as well.
6. No seriousposting
We don't want your uncut war footage, fundraisers, credible news articles, or other such things. The world is already serious enough as it is.
7. No classified material
Classified ‘western’ information is off limits regardless of how "open source" and "easy to find" it is.
8. Source artwork
If you use somebody's art in your post or as your post, the OP must provide a direct link to the art's source in the comment section, or a good reason why this was not possible (such as the artist deleting their account). The source should be a place that the artist themselves uploaded the art. A booru is not a source. A watermark is not a source.
9. No low-effort posts
No egregiously low effort posts. E.g. screenshots, recent reposts, simple reaction & template memes, and images with the punchline in the title. Put these in weekly Matrix chat instead.
10. Don't get us banned
No brigading or harassing other communities. Do not post memes with a "haha people that I hate died… haha" punchline or violating the sh.itjust.works rules (below). This includes content illegal in Canada.
11. No misinformation
NCD exists to make fun of misinformation, not to spread it. Make outlandish claims, but if your take doesn’t show signs of satire or exaggeration it will be removed. Misleading content may result in a ban. Regardless of source, don’t post obvious propaganda or fake news. Double-check facts and don't be an idiot.
Join our Matrix chatroom
Other communities you may be interested in
- !militaryporn@lemmy.world
- !forgottenweapons@lemmy.world
- !combatvideos@sh.itjust.works
- !militarymoe@ani.social
Banner made by u/Fertility18
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Good luck targeting someone who can be at multiple places at the same time. That guy operates in eleven dimensions.
hah! The 1993 documentary The Nightmare Before Christmas already conclusively proved that Santa can't even evade regular ol' flak
Don't worry, Santa has countermeasures.
I would honestly bet on the ancient flying wizard.
When the missile is about to strike Santa's sleigh he opens his bag of tricks and inside it goes into an extra dimensional space. Then later he gives a nice missile, refueled and deactivated with a bow on it, to a Ukrainian artillerist who's been good this year.
I picture battle hardened soldier sleeping, sitting down, with arms around ballistic guides surface to air missile the way a child might hug a stuffed animal.
You do not want the elves to find the location of your instalation
You have one shot before asking for mercy
Fat man's not just hypersonic, he's superluminal.
I love when weapons are called Patriot.
Especially when their job is to rush at the enemy and explode themselves.
We've been trying to get him for over half a century
C-RAM looks more Christmasy at night
i don't think a sleigh and some reindeer gives off enough heat or bounces enough radar for anything to lock onto it.
Also the calculated speeds, to be able to deliver presents all over the world on a single night are enormous. And with amazing maneuverability, too!!
The Patriot system uses radar guidance. Radars can easily spots individual birds. A sixpack of reindeer, a sled, and one fat ass riding it should lit up like a chrismas tree for the radar.
However, according to the picture, OP only has the missiles, but no radar to guide them. In other words: he has dead weight that can't hit shit.
i don't think a sleigh and some reindeer gives off enough heat
You're forgetting about Rudolph: https://www.noradsanta.org/en/noradhq
According to NORAD, Rudolph's nose emits in a similar part of the IR spectrum as conventional missiles.