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How to get past this (lemmy.ml)

submitted 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) by Pherenike@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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My father insists on a version of past events that is not true, where he supposedly helped me pay off debt when in reality I paid it off by working FOR YEARS. He doesn't say it as something he's proud of, but something I owe him and haven't "thanked" him for (?). He is extremely stubborn and old enough to definitely not remember things well.
He does this kind of thing with my siblings as well and it's come to the point where we feel that all we really were for our father was a money burden, be it true or not that he helped us financially at some point. How can I come to terms with the fact that he's not gonna acknowledge the truth no matter how many times I explain it to him, despite the anger and frustration I feel towards him for claiming something he actually DIDN'T do for his kid while minimizing my own work and effort?

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[–] HubertManne@moist.catsweat.com 2 points 5 days ago

Yeah I still refer to it as a belief for basically two reasons. One is that soft sciences are usually a bit more indeterminent but more importantly I believe this always happens to some degree regardless of the individual and one can possibly be really center and cognizant and keep it to a minimum effect but if one is to live within a context of maximum reality they need to minimize any lying or deception in their lives. Of course that won't help you society or government not running based on reality.