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How to get past this (lemmy.ml)

submitted 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) by Pherenike@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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My father insists on a version of past events that is not true, where he supposedly helped me pay off debt when in reality I paid it off by working FOR YEARS. He doesn't say it as something he's proud of, but something I owe him and haven't "thanked" him for (?). He is extremely stubborn and old enough to definitely not remember things well.
He does this kind of thing with my siblings as well and it's come to the point where we feel that all we really were for our father was a money burden, be it true or not that he helped us financially at some point. How can I come to terms with the fact that he's not gonna acknowledge the truth no matter how many times I explain it to him, despite the anger and frustration I feel towards him for claiming something he actually DIDN'T do for his kid while minimizing my own work and effort?

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[–] weeeeum@lemmy.world 15 points 4 days ago (1 children)

There reaches a point in human stupidity that it suddenly becomes impossible to realize one's stupidity. These people cannot be fixed and cannot be helped in anyway that benefits anyone else around them. Even therapy won't do anything as they've become so stubborn and self righteous that they'd never believe the therapist, or bother to improve.

There is a reason this saying exists. "You can't fix stupid".

Ive been dealing with something similar to my mom. She's extremely abusive and entitled. She insists that I "owe her"

It's repeated a lot but rings loud for a reason. Cut them out.

[–] Pherenike@lemmy.ml 1 points 4 days ago

Thank you. My siblings and I have decided we aren't even going to reply to him anymore.