this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
592 points (96.0% liked)

196

16500 readers
2857 users here now

Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.

Rule: You must post before you leave.

^other^ ^rules^

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 42 points 1 month ago (11 children)

not knowing someone's pronouns & assuming wrong =/= misgendering

knowing someone's pronouns and intentionally using the wrong ones = misgendering

[–] Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (10 children)

Also, fighting years of muscle memory =/= misgendering.

I might have misgendered an old friend of mine shortly after they started transitioning, but they knew it was a mistake and didn't seem to care.

[–] princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yeah absolutely this. I've seen too often in trans spaces when these sorts of accidents aren't given any leeway or grace. We're all human though, and it bothers me when folks are put down when there was zero malicious intent.

My mum deadnamed me more recently, despite me being out for almost eight years now. But she called me my older brother's name first, then deadname, then Norah. She was mortified, and apologised profusely. How could I hold any ill will against her for that?

[–] PsychedSy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Lmfao. I'd never thought of that as an extra issue for trans people. My mom can go through her siblings, then my sister and I before getting my brother's name right.

[–] princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 month ago

To be fair, my brother was at least present!

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)