this post was submitted on 02 Oct 2024
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Autism

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How to Socialize? (lemm.ee)
submitted 1 month ago by gronjo45@lemm.ee to c/autism@lemmy.world
33 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

How do you get other people to speak with you? Usually I never know what to say in response.

Being a chatterbox hasn’t worked out too well throughout my life. Even in my second language, German, it’s evident im sort of a “parrot” when it comes to learned social phrases.

Socially exhausted right now and feeling like an alien.

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[–] gronjo45@lemm.ee 2 points 1 month ago

I love your phrasing of “behind the back punishment”. Working in an office long enough and hearing the gossip about others makes me realize that myself personally is not exempt from being gossiped about.

I’d rather not say a “no-no” by accident when showing my candid self, which gets me grouped into being an odd ball. I have a mask personality that quite frankly I hate. He’s boring, plain, and can’t show any of his ultra specific interests or adeptness without coming off as a show off. It’s hard to talk about how I can play multiple instruments, speak many languages, and enjoy electronics and gardening without coming off as some bougie pretentious fuck. Hopefully I’m far from that, but a lot of the times my non chalantness with how I’ve taught myself all these skills make people think I’m over inflating my abilities or I’m just trying to brag.

Generally I’ve been a confidante to many people because they are willing to open up to me. But I think once I learn such deep information about someone so early in a friendship, this person regrets sharing the candid side of themselves and then distances themself from me.