Ask Lemmy

Yes and no.

I feel it is important for the human condition - it's also a part of my faith system but entirely separately from that it also seems to me to lead to the most "zen", as in if we only focus on ourselves that seems like the fastest way to unhappiness? (Is Jeff Bezos happy? Is Elon Musk? Is Steve Huffman? money flows like a river and if it only comes in but never is given away then that leads to imbalance)

But so very many organized charities have been revealed to be frauds that I am extremely wary of giving to one that I had not vetted, especially one associated with organized religion. But that requires so very much effort... still it's part of it and connects you to it.:-)

One thing I love to do is tip. I'm in America btw, so it's an important part of what they need, and these are people who are WORKING for it - like, they aren't just street beggers (although I've given to them too - I usually have quite mixed feelings about that one though, and tend to not). Especially if I'm ever in a southern state - 10-20% just barely does anything for a $6 meal at a Waffle House, so those rules should not apply. According to my way of thinking, it is just part of the cost of the service - like I could go to a grocery store and make my own food, but if I to "out" to eat then I want to do what I can to counteract the evil fuckwads who decided that $2.25 an hour or whatever it is before tips are counted towards their paycheck (so not minimum wage + tips but that amount instead).

And as others are also saying, don't neglect the non-financial ways of "giving" as well - something as simple as offering to flip a mattress for an old person or trim someone's yard for someone dealing with an injury, which may be trivial for one but exceedingly difficult for another.

Also compliments. I'm not good at this and virtually never do it actually - but it might just be more important than anything else you could do for someone, e.g. could you prevent someone's suicide just by offering such a simple gesture of support? (possibly not entirely intentional too, like a fentanyl overdose) Maybe I'm being too naive here and inflating the power of such... or maybe I'm still underselling the importance here?

Anyway it's more about you than it is them - who do you want to be, someone who takes takes takes or someone who gives gives gives? Like when someone sees you walking into the room, do you want them to cover up their wallet/purse or beam with an authentic smile?

But don't be stupid about it. If you give away your paycheck and then cannot pay rent, then you'll be the one needing help. Therefore, treat financial "giving" like any other budgeted amount - not a "I feel like it today so here's a good tip", and more of a "every single time I go out, this is what I expect to offer" (and if service is poor so you feel that you can't give it to them, then find someone else to offer it to?). The vast majority of us really need so much less than consumer culture says that we do - and I for one find chasing the monetized dream to be a futile endeavor, but giving is one of the most sure-fire ways to produce, if not "happiness" (not every time) then at least a settledness/peace overall.

Dare to be different, especially if you know that you are doing a right thing, and "remember the human" very much seems to be that, for me.