this post was submitted on 27 May 2024
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Which side of the bed is the left side? Is the answer based on the perspective of laying in the bed (person's head at the head end)? Is the answer based on viewing it from the foot of the bed, looking at the head of the bed? Is there an "anatomical position" or special terminology like in boating for this?

For context: My boyfriend and I can't agree on this. We change who gets which side based on the shoulder we'd predominantly sleep on and how it's feeling. This let's us get good cuddles before shoulder pain gets irritated. He comes to bed after me. A while back he asked what side I'm sleeping on. I said "left". Later that night, he comes in and almost lays directly on me because he claims "left" is the other side. Since then we have to describe which side using complicated descriptions.

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[โ€“] agelord@lemmy.world 32 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Forget left-right. Use port and starboard.

[โ€“] MrsDoyle@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

This is the correct answer. It's how ships avoid running into each other. When whoever is steering the vessel is facing the bow (front, usually the pointy bit), port is their left, starboard their right. Ship's running lights are red on the port side, green on the left. So if you're out on the water at night, you can immediately see whether a ship is coming towards you or moving away. The rule for passing an oncoming vessel is "port to port", thus avoiding confusion and collision.

Sitting up in bed I would consider the headboard the stern, because I have my back to it, and the foot the bow. So the area to starboard is right, and portside is left. Ahoy maties!!!

[โ€“] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 9 points 5 months ago (4 children)

Well, so which is the front and which is the back?

[โ€“] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 16 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The front is where the spoiler isn't.

Race car beds FTW.

[โ€“] JackbyDev@programming.dev 3 points 5 months ago

I actually love this. Imagine all cars are race car beds and then use driver and passenger side lol.

[โ€“] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Beds have a head and a foot, so the head is fore and the foot aft.

[โ€“] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 6 points 5 months ago

Ah. But in a bed race, it's foot-first, implying a direction of travel that itself dictates head==aft and foot==fore. Totally different from how ironman flies, fwiw.

[โ€“] Nemo@midwest.social 5 points 5 months ago

You mean "prow" and "stern".

[โ€“] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

port and starboard are based on the orientation of the ship, not the outside observer

[โ€“] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Yes, but without knowing which is fore and which is aft you cannot make that judgement.

[โ€“] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

fore would definitely be the foot of the bed. that's where you are looking when you are using the bed properly

[โ€“] AdamEatsAss@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[โ€“] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 1 points 5 months ago

the bed was designed for sleeping. just because you can face any direction while fucking on it doesn't mean anything, because the same can be said of a ship

[โ€“] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Driver's side and passengers side?

Stage left and stage right? (Depends on where your curtains are).

[โ€“] agelord@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago (3 children)

People drive in different sides in different parts of the world.

[โ€“] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 5 months ago

Fuck it, topside, underside.

[โ€“] Fermion@mander.xyz 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The majority of people occupying the same bed will have congruent driver/passenger sides. Distant strangers don't need to know which side you are referring to. Couples from different regions could adopt the local convention.

[โ€“] AdamEatsAss@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago

Seems like a flawed system. Why would auto manufactures not force the whole world to do it the same?

[โ€“] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 5 months ago

I assume OP and their partner drive on the same side of the road as each other though lol