I'm not heterophobic, but I think it's the parents' choice when their child learns about straight people. Schools should not be forcing the straight agenda on us!

My nonbinary kid asked me "mommy, why are these parents different?" pointing to a book read in school containing a straight couple. I was furious! How am I supposed to explain this to them?! They're not old enough to understand! Then they showed me a flashback scene, showing one of the parents being named and assigned a sex in the hospital, "Mommy, why didn't he [the baby, parent in the story] change his assigned gender?". Heterosexual and cis??? This is just forced diversity! Now my child is asking me about what that's like, but I don't want them getting sucked into that lifestyle! What if they start to think sex-segregated bathrooms are a good idea, or make assumptions about other people's genders? Or what if, and this possibility kills me, they transition to attack helicopter (AKA cis)?!

They're even making straight and cis friends, who I feel are a bad influence on them. And those friends are explaining to them what it's like to be straight or cis! I need the woke teachers to step in and stop their terrible influence, or just outright ban even the mention of straight or cis! The cis kids are saying they feel othered in HRT class, and my kid's trying to make them feel welcome?! You don't help the worthless, I mean, troublesome people, they get what they deserve from our Gaylord Satan!

Massive /s of course. I considered bringing in the idea of forced transition but that felt like taking it too far, even for an obviously sarcastic post, though it would've been an accurate satire for transphobes.