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When would you let go? (lemmy.world)

submitted 10 months ago by wintermutehal@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Hey all! This may be kind of a dumb post as I know I need to make this decision myself, but I‘d sure love some advice. My oldest dog is 11, going on 12. The poor girl is diabetic, blind, has fatty lipomas, and mobility issues due to diabetes, breed, and age. This morning, we are fairly sure she had a stroke of some sort (the vet agrees with this diagnosis so far, blood work and an X-ray are incoming). She eats but doesn’t really want to get up much, and is generally just resting most of the day. She still has a bit of sparkle in her eyes but she doesn’t really seem to have much energy left. The vet hasn’t mentioned it, but I‘m pretty sure it’s about time to say goodbye. The most important thing to my partner and I is that once she’s suffering, it’s time to let go. She just ate a nice full dinner but still doesn’t want to get up and do much. How long would you give her? Till she’s not eating? The vet hasn’t brought it up yet, so maybe I should be patient, but she’s been such a good friend, I don’t want her to suffer. I’m just at a loss, and this is the first time I‘ve had to do this horrible calculus.

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[–] SecretPancake@feddit.de 9 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I had this same situation in 2022 with my 16 year old rescue (don’t be intimidated by that age, some dogs can just live longer). He already had cystitis two times. Hip issues, like most shepherds get (he was a mixed breed though), pain in all his legs, had a hard time standing up and walking. And he walked very slowly. Could not wag his tail anymore. He went deaf but we both handled that part pretty well. He didn’t eat much anymore and did not seem to enjoy anything. Writing all this down now I think, Wow that was a lot, but all these issues grew over time and only the worst ones appeared very late and it got exponentially worse. Some days it was clearly time to let him go. Other days it got better and I changed my mind again. That went on for many weeks, months.

My vet was always very supportive. She never said I should do it, because it had to be my decision, but she made sure to comfort me and say that it’s ok if I decide to do it and don’t have to feel guilty. Finally when I was at the vet for a checkup and meds I decided to do it. She agreed and explained the process to me and we went through with it. I was crying through it all but it was ok.

Talk to your vet. They’ve seen so many people go through this. I’d say if you feel like it might be time there is probably a good reason for it. You know your dog well and you know when she’s not the same anymore and it’s not just a phase.

I wish we could ask our pets but we can only make that decision for them.