this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2023
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Asklemmy
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I'd fuck it up even more so more people would move to the fediverse.
"Hello Reddit. I am the new CEO of reddit. The Board of Directors have decided to fire u/spez for his incompetence, and I will now create a better future for Reddit Communities. First matter of business, all criticism of Reddit, The CEO, Website Administrators, The Board of Directors, Investors are hereby forbidden. Any mentions of the Communist/Fascist platform known as Lemmy is strictly forbidden. Any news criticizing the government is forbidden. Any posts/comments criticizing anything is forbidden, any posts/comments criticizing the people who criticize is also forbidden. You must make at least one post saying how Great of a CEO I am every day. Any violations of rules results in an IP ban, and your IP address will be published along with anyone associated user accounts.
I REPEAT: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MIGRATE LEMMY/KBIN/THE FEDIVERSE, I WILL BAN YOU. DON'T TEST US!"
Then I will take my time and slowly, very slowly censoring content, but not too fast so the posts linking to Lemmy has a chance of showing up on the front page.