I consider everyone an ally by default. It's just another aspect of the social contract we're all a part of. Love and accept others. You're only out once you break the contract, and you can always get back in by learning to love and trying to make it right with those who were wronged.

[–] Drivebyhaiku@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Not... Always... The "you can always come back" thing is not something that you can always count on. Being wholly rejected for trying to be your authentic self can leave some wicked deep scars. It's always on the wronged person to forgive when there's a lot of pressure to accept someone back into the fold. It can destroy you when everyone around you just wants to forget what happened in favor of social peace when you have to carry that damage with you. Coming out as trans historically is a lot of people's last ditch effort to live in that they feel they the status quo is killing them. Sometimes they also look at being openly trans as the last resort failure state but are desperate to find any reason to go on even if the tradeoffs are horrible.

The kicks you receieve when you are at your lowest point you never really forget. Sometimes "trying to make it right with the wronged" means accepting you hurt someone bad enough that you don't get second chances to try again and having to respect that.