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Tell us your definitive "I really should not do this" moment. (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by qyron@sopuli.xyz to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Ever had one those moments in life when you know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, you are making a very, very bad decision, with a great chance for instant regret and a miserable, probably long lasting, outcome and notheless followed that path?

Yeah, that one. Care to share with us?

I'll start. I dated a person, after we had already dated for a very short time, during which I was cheated on and eventually was left for a fourth person.

Yeah, not my brightest moment. And yes, I was cheated on again and again was left for another person.

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[–] penquin@lemmy.kde.social 126 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Having kids. I love my kids, but if I could go back and not have them I absolutely would. Never have kids until you're financially comfortable. Fuck, the struggle is fucking real.

[–] Blake@feddit.uk 50 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I really admire the honesty and bravery it took to write this comment. Thank you for sharing.

[–] penquin@lemmy.kde.social 17 points 11 months ago

It is a sad reality that I hate even thinking about. I love these little bastards to pieces, but the money thing is killing me. I'm in a spot where I'm "too rich" to qualify for any government help and too poor to be able to afford it on my own.

[–] AngryDemonoid@lemmy.lylapol.com 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

My wife and I had a similar conversation the other day. The kids were being a handful, and she said, "Why do people even have kids?"

And I said it's because society lies to you. "You'll never feel emotionally/mentally/financially ready for kids. Just do it!"

I always tell people that you need to be 110% sure. I wouldn't trade my kids for anything, but I sure do miss the quiet, free time, and extra money.

[–] Ataraxia@sh.itjust.works 4 points 11 months ago

And for most people that day never comes and THAT'S PERFECTLY FINE. It is horrifying that something as extreme as creating a human from nothing is seen as something that people should just do. Baffling.

[–] penquin@lemmy.kde.social 4 points 11 months ago

"You'll never feel emotionally/mentally/financially ready for kids. Just do it!"

That's basically the biggest lie/bullshit you can ever hear. You can always be ready for kids. I just need $75+k a year and I'll be more than happy.

[–] kamen@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I feel this. I still don't have kids of my own, but my parents had some rough patches which I hope I learn from and don't repeat; thankfully I only realised most of that when I grew up.

[–] penquin@lemmy.kde.social 3 points 11 months ago

Much respect to your parents and you. Raising kids has been the most difficult thing I've done in my life, and I've been deployed into war zones twice.