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If someone's pronouns are any/all, what should I use or how should I determine how to refer to you and what pronouns to use? (monyet.cc)

submitted 1 year ago by DragonWasabi@monyet.cc to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I want to be respectful but if they say they don't care what pronouns I use for them, that feels like it puts the decision on me to choose what to call them and I guess I would probably default to "they" because choosing a gender for them feels weird... am I wrong?

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[–] Nemo@midwest.social 4 points 1 year ago

I'm a man, I give my pronouns as any/all, because I'm comfortable with all.

I have a coworker who only uses feminine pronouns for me, because that's what she uses for everyone, including herself. She is also a man. I also use feminine pronouns for myself sometimes, eg. when quoting something I find analogous to myself that was written using feminine pronouns.

Obviously both male and neutral pronouns are fine as well.

Gender is a social construct, and IMO most men who get offended by being referred to by feminine words do so because they really believe being a woman is lesser to being a man. I'm not about that.