this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2023
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Asklemmy
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I've got a competent and authoritative voice. People frequently assume I'm the most qualified in a group when I'm really objectively not as soon as i start speaking. Whatever I say or decide rarely gets questioned and people just keep letting me do stuff. When something is my word against another's, people believe me.When I say something is needed, it's done. When I make a proposal, that's usually what's agreed on and done without me really trying to push it.
This is familiar.
In particular, my accent gives me a distinct advantage, as I speak with what some might describe as a "BBC" English accent. I work using English outside of the UK in a multinational company, and it's served me very well.
In international contexts people just seem to trust that I know what I'm talking about, because they think that I sound like I should be narrating a nature documentary.
I'm not super sure what it is for me. I'm able to code switch pretty easily, and I don't speak obvious dialect unless I explicitly mean to (I'm not a native english speaker, but it applies to english as well). It's generally a great thing to have. I know a few people who struggle with being listened to, and honestly, it looks like it sucks.
The only downside I've ever seen is that you have to be super honest to yourself about what you can and can not handle, or it can spin out of control quickly. Sometimes others assume you're capable of anything they ask you to, and you don't correct them because you think you might get away with it. But when you can't pull it off, they will be disappointed and not very understanding. So it kinda becomes your job to point out your shortcomings to others early and frequently, which takes some mental energy, and I struggled with it when i was younger. I was very insecure on the inside, while seeming very confident to others. But I learned that if you do it in a competent voice, it just makes you more trustworthy because being honest about your mistakes and shortcomings when other people already think you're capable is seen as a mature and responsible thing. So it works out in the end.
Completely agree with your suggestion for handling this issue. This is something I've experienced most of my life as well and have only started realizing it at work the past few years. As I started working on more complicated subjects with a lot of room for ambiguity and error, I really have to make sure and qualify what I know for certain and what is more speculation in my work conversations.