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Have you ever tried telling a friend that you didn't like their partner and they should not be together? They are much more likely to get mad at you and stop talking with you than they are to leave their partner. Just search the advice columns on 'how to tell a friend their partner is bad'. Every one is filled with comments like "I did that and they got mad at me", or "we told her and she ignored us and keeps going back". I'm not really surprised nobody intervened.
I wonder if you were mostly angry at yourself for being in that situation. Maybe angry you could be so foolish or naive. Then you projected that anger onto your friends and family. Anyways, I'm glad you made it through that period.