prl

"I don't always oppress my citizens, but when I do, I make sure they know who's boss."

“I believe in free speech. As long as that speech is praising me.”

"The people of Tropico may be poor, but at least they're happy. Or at least they pretend to be."

"I may be a dictator, but at least I'm not a boring dictator."

“Democracy is a great system, as long as everyone votes the way I want them to.”

"I don't always listen to my advisors, but when I do, I prefer the ones who tell me what I want to hear."

"I believe in a government of the people, by the people, for the people. As long as those people are loyal to me."

A woman is walking home with her three daughters- Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock.
Rose asks her mother, “Mom, why did you name me Rose?”
To which her mother replies, “Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head!”
Lily, curious now, asks her mother “Mom, why did you name me after a flower too?”
To which her mother replies, “Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a lily fell on your head!”
Cinderblock says to her mother, “~hghghdnbgh~!!? ^dnbgh^!??!”