Yeah, I said it was a different subculture... Then the dude was like no it's not... Then I was like yeah, not bdsm in general, a subculture... Hope you're caught up now buddy
Sorry not usually this much of a dick but I lose patience with those with people who won't read
Oh BDSM in general isn't like that, sure, but I'm in a submissive focused discord and there are many people there who have lifestyle dynamics similar to the one in the post. Like yeah the poster doesn't know what they're talking about but those kinds of dynamics certainly do exist. They're not something I'm comfortable with, self discipline has to come from the self and to me having discipline for life things like that come from your partner enforcing that on you feels like a crutch that I'm not ok with personally, but ykinmk and all that.
It's honestly kind of interesting to me, I think dynamics fall onto a spectrum of being controlled to being taken care of. I mean that in a general sense, not specific things like aftercare. Like yes caring for and about your partner is an important part of any relationship but that end of the spectrum falls more under parental care in my mind. I'm certainly no expert, lifestyle dynamics aren't for me, but I like lurking and observing because I think it's neat.
Things will continue on as normal, gradually worsening, until life is no longer worth living. Sure, what people are hysterical about won't change your daily routine tomorrow, or the next day, or the next month, but many negative things are glaciers, slowly and inexorably moving forward and you are utterly powerless to stop it. Climate change, worsening inequality and wealth gap, and the rise of fascism are things we should be hysterical about. But instead, we'll just sit around, complaining about people freaking out, until it's too late.
It's a different subculture than the ones you know.
Yeah, I'm not a huge pain person either. I don't enjoy the pain, I enjoy the submission, if that makes sense. The dom I occasionally see will alternate between spanking me and gently stroking my body, building the anticipation and juxtaposing the pain, and will fake on spanks--it's truly something I never thought I'd love so much.
Scat, eh, not my thing but I don't find it repulsive. Not being grossed out by shit makes enemas more convenient. Watersports, sure, I've had a dom use me as a urinal, pretty hot. Rape? Sure, on the receiving end. Mostly in the vein of CNC with bdsm.
Not the person you're replying to but it kinda feels like the "oh I don't see color" comment when somebody brings up racism. To me, it feels... dismissive? I dunno. I don't think what you said is a problem or anything, it just... feels like it has bad connotations to me. Take this with a grain of salt, what I understand and interpret can be very different from what you say, which can also differ from what you mean.
10 tbh. No pedophile shit but some things that would probably make some friends break ties with me. My close friends would understand but the ones who I've drifted away from over time who are more towards the conservative side of things (NOT conservatives though) would probably just peace out. More public facing, probably a 7 or 8? Let's go with 8. Into BDSM and a big sub, watersports, impact play, bondage, etc. Petplay, kind of, I'd love to be someone's pet but animal roleplay isn't something I'm comfortable with. I'm a huge anal enjoyer and a size queen but I've only toyed, never been fucked. Some friends are comfortable with it and I can talk about it casually with them, others aren't so I don't bring it up around them. So yeah, in terms of the bell curve, I'm waaaaaay off to the right in sexual weirdness. Took me a long time to get comfortable with it to the extent I can talk about it like this, and now I'm a chronic oversharer. If you want to know about the 10, you can dm me, it's just not something I want available to anyone scrolling through my post history.
The point of T is that you don't have to care
Transfem here, generally unless the topic being discussed is gender specific users genders aren't relevant. Though, Lemmy has a pretty bad track record with gender relations imo, the whole women choosing the bear thing was such a shit show. The men's lib community is good though, I've interacted with a couple posts there that popped up on my feed while scrolling and it actually consists of users who are empathetic and understanding and not anti-women like the reddit one turned into. It's interesting, Lemmy has many many more male users than female, and it goes a bit further, with the ratio of transmascs to transfems being reversed. I just think it's interesting that it's an amab/afab split rather than a gender split. As someone in the thread trans-hatingly put it, "even the women are men here."
Final boss might be a dungeon master instead