felhfeltetel

This. 🙂 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcranial_magnetic_stimulation?wprov=sfla1

Exactly. It's heartbreaking.

So, I am one TMS short of the final treatment that is going to happen tomorrow. They say it will have it's effects in 2 weeks time. I feel better, but from complex causes, mainly a supportive family.

Today I attended my very first protest and met the president of our party. On one hand it was a blast, I had old guys congratulating me showing up for the event and a young comrade approaching me to engage in a conversation. Not to mention the several positive comments and smiles I got for the pins I was wearing. On the other hand, I have hyper-empathy and I hated every second of people walking by and making comments and so on. There was even a dude spitting once towards the speaker. How do you guys process shit like this? The feeling was and still kinda is unbearable.

I used to be very invested in my teams, not anymore. I occasionally watch the games, highlights or certain shows about them, but overall I am drifting further and further away from them, mostly because of my obsession with associating myself with things. Everything has to be close to 100% in agreement with my values and you can guess sports are far from that number. They are leftovers from my childhood but they belong there as well. I sometimes take out and put on my jerseys I bought when I was younger, but my fandom is starting to be a thing of the past.

I am technically still the fan of AC Milan in terms of ⚽, and the Wizards doing something that kinda resembles 🏀.

Why would you want to cool your ceiling? /s

Spent the weekend in the psych ward voluntarily, just to be safe. Now towards the end of the week, I'll prolly get my first TMS and then I can be out once and for all. See you next Monday! Have a great week, I think I'll go to the movies tomorrow, it's not a fun place guys..

Reported

Sadly I have been sent to a mental hospital because of thinking about suicide. The depression and anxiety that's caused by my autism has done it's thing throughout the 20 some years and I was no longer willing to continue. I am reading about Lenin, that and my family helps me going, but as you would guess it's terribly hard. If I get out of here, I'll try to join the party, maybe that will help me with my depression. Tomorrow is my evaluation, deciding what they want to do with me, hoping they will see that it's my autism causing the depression and they'd let me leave. Root for me guys, please.

I don't know about other servers, but do this if you are looking to have your account on the genzedong server.

Open the Element app, or one of it's forks. Get to the sign-up page, where you'd be requested to choose your sever. It will default to matrix.org, but below that, you'll have the option to add a different server than that. After choosing that option, enter the address: genzedong.xyz You then choose your username and skip the option to add an e-mail address to your future account. After these you should land in your account. Then you have to follow the steps to be a verified new member, by either answering the questions listed in one of the visible rooms or messaging the admin of your choice, telling them your Lemmygrad username. After a little waiting, you are hopefully approved and are able to use your account without an added e-mail address.

For a more detailed guide, look for the matrix room ad in every week's general discussion.

I don't have any now, but when I was younger I really liked Shay Patrick Cormac from AC Rogue.

It was more so just a "I think he is really cool" type of connection. Not sure what I would think of him revisiting his story now, with a more mature personality.

Welcome! Enjoy your time here! :)

I've used it for a long time, great tool! The wordsmith instance iirc.