Calamades

joined 1 year ago
[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago

Thanks, I appreciate it. Trying to have a good attitude and not get too upset but that's obviously easier said than done.

Yep, I keep mostly succulents indoors along with some epiphytes (plants that grow on other plants). I have a couple bonsai plants and am working on shaping and training some Crassula ovata ("Jade plant") bonsai! Succulents are a great entry point for plant keeping as they are often very hardy and are fine with just kind of being forgotten about!

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

My partner finally finally got his driver's license back after having a seizure in December, so we spent yesterday driving around to all the different nurseries for me to look for monsteras. No luck, but I did find a tillandsia the size of a baby's head so that was neat.

I've been trying to put out of my mind the fact that I just learned that a close family member has lymphoma. They're young and in exceptionally good health otherwise (and the remission rate is already good for the specific type) so I am trying to hold onto hope that this will just be a bad memory in a few months. But it still sucks and I hate to think of them isolated and in pain.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Job hunting sucks. As other posters said, if there is a store or cafe or something that you go to a lot, that's a good place to start. If you're in a position where you can ease into things and not focus too too much on earning, I really recommend volunteering. Think of an interest you have, whether it is animals, art, sports, and look into volunteer organizations in your area. Special Olympics always needs volunteers and is a ridiculous amount of fun. Volunteer positions will pad out your resume, give you valuable skills in interpersonal relationships and learning job routines, and are an easy and low stress kind of soft entry into work.

Eta, your local library is a great resource for volunteer positions.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

Very sadly same. I have struggled so hard to maintain friendships and family connections throughout my life and am fortunate to have finally found some friends who are patient and persistent enough to basically force me to keep in touch with them, but don't take it personally if I vanish for 6 months without a word. I'm just much happier on my own with my cats, plants, hobbies, and partner and don't even actually remember other people exist a lot of the time.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

That I may be autistic. Literally had a friend of 10+ years who works with nonverbal pre-K kiddies with autism say to me "You know you're autistic, right?" So I started taking some tests online and reading some books and stuff, and dang, that would make a lot of sense. Not sure if I want to try and seek an official diagnosis as it is apparently pretty difficult to access in my area. But as an AFAB elder millennial who has struggled my entire life with making friends, interacting socially, and progressing in careers it is really freaking interesting to maybe finally have a reason for that.

ETA that I have spoken to my therapist about this at length and she has casually agreed that I may meet a lot of the criteria and we are spending a lot of time breaking this all down. I'm very fortunate to have the access to mental healthcare that I do have.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

Hail yourself! I was just scrolling back to see if anyone had met any of the boys. I am sad I haven't met any of them yet. Seems like all of them would be excellent folks to get a beer and talk about weird shit with. It's strange how parasocial relationships work. I've been listening to them twice a week for 8 years and feel like they're my friends.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

I am so jealous. If I could meet one person in the world it would be Dolly. She is my absolute hero. I don't even think I'd be able to speak, I would just start crying.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

I find Discord is a lot better than social media for making connections. As another user said, it started out for me as a topic based platform. I get engaged in communities that are about my interests, and start posting and talking there. From being actively engaged in discussions about a common topic, you gradually start to know who you get along with, who you have other stuff in common with, and now I have several pretty good friends that I have ongoing DM convos with about off topic stuff and our personal lives.

Social media in general I think can be great if you're trying to create or foster community or a brand (as an artist, merchant, professional, etc) but for making one on one connections so far Discord is much better for me for creating actual friendships.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Spoiler, that link is appalling and managed to pop up a bunch of weird shit on my phone despite all my blockers.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

At the time I used to see him regularly he wore the same pair of disgusting filthy grey sweatpants every day and was rude and condescending as all hell. Pretty sure he was probably going through a rough period in life but that doesn't give anyone a pass to be an asshole.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Believe it or not, most of the big actors and stuff I met while I was working at various big retailers in Union Square, like Circuit City (rip), Barnes and Noble, and the Virgin mega store. There are absolutely a ton more that I did not list and probably more that I have forgotten lmao. Taye Diggs (very nice, seemed shy), James Iha (super friendly and excited to meet fans), Natasha Lyonne (messy drunk), David Sedaris (nice, smells good), Elaine Aberlin (Lady Elaine from Mr. Rogers, over the moon to meet someone who recognized her as an adult, gave me lots of hugs, hard to end the conversation with haha), lots more.

I've always been low key and friendly when interacting with celebs, especially when seeing them while they're just going about their business. I don't think they're more valuable or interesting than other people and I think most of the time that is a welcome break.

I've also gone to tons and tons and tons of concerts throughout my life, many while volunteering or doing activism work, and I have met a kajillion bands and performers like that. Lots of people who started out small and later made it big.

I actually met Joan Jett at a county fair, and when I saw her play again a couple months later she recognized me (and then I saw her play again like 12+ times and eventually started just bumping into her because apparently we have similar interests and hung out in similar places lol). I highly recommend going to see her at every and any opportunity. She puts on an incredible live show that feels like a party and is a super sweet and wholesome person.

[–] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 year ago

It's weird, right? As long as I am being a helper I can do anything. I think this is a pretty big clue that we should value ourselves as much as we do our friends!

 

About 3/4 of my outside plants, almost all crassulas, having a lovely drink in the rain. Zone 6

 

I don't actually have IDs on most of these, beyond Hatoria salicornioides, a couple of Rhipsalis, and two different holiday cacti. I don't collect desert cacti but their tropical cousins are delightful and have taken off like crazy since I moved them into this window.

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